WELCOME to Monday April 6, 2020
Here’s the story…
A group of 40-year-old buddies discuss where they should have dinner. Finally it is
agreed that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen restaurant because the
waitresses there have low-cut blouses. Ten years later, at 50 years of age, the group
meets again and once again they discuss where they should have dinner. Finally it is
agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because the food
there is very good and the wine selection is good also. Ten years later at 60 years of age,
the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should have dinner.
Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because
they can eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant is smoke free. Ten years later,
at 70 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should
have dinner. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen
because the restaurant is wheel chair accessible and they even have an elevator. Ten years later, at 80 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should have dinner. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because they have never been there before. 😱 That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
Quotes of the Day
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife
you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher. – Socrates
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something
that brought tears to my eyes. He said, “No hablo ingles.”
I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get
all nervous and give the wrong answers.
There is a fine line between fishing and just
standing on the shore like an idiot.
Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of
and coax them along with a carrot. Some you stand behind
and kick them in the rear end. The key to management is
knowing which mules are which.
“Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay,
and you never get anything back.” – Al Bundy
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
Rushing to work, I was driving too fast and as a result was pulled over by the highway patrol. The state trooper noticed that my shirt had the name of a local high school on it. “I teach math there,” I explained. The trooper smiled, and said, “Okay, here’s a problem. A teacher is speeding down the highway at 16 m.p.h. over the limit. At $12 for every mile, plus $40 court costs, plus the rise in her insurance, what’s her total cost?” I replied, “Taking that total, subtracting the low salary I receive, multiplying by the number of kids who hate math, then adding to that the fact that none of us would be anywhere without teachers, I’d say zero.” He handed me back my license. “Math was never my favorite subject,” he admitted. “Please slow down.” 😁
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”
“Hey, I guess they’re right. Senior citizens, although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, can still serve a purpose. I’ll be right back. Don’t you go dying on me!”
Answer: Dumb and Dumber!
This quote is taken from “Dumb and Dumber”, my all-time favorite buddy movie. The film sees Lloyd Christmas, played by Jim Carrey, and his equally moronic friend Harry trying to return a brief case to a limo passenger of Lloyd’s named Mary. This scene is where Lloyd needs change to get a paper and asks a sweet little old lady to watch his stuff while he goes in “to break a dollar”. After this quote though, she robs him! Funny stuff.
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
” Gertie, I have to go pick up Elliot. Will you be a good girl and stay…”
Friday’s Quizzler is….
What is special about these four words?
what, hole, ales, test
Answer: If you take each corresponding letter from each word, the same words are formed again:
What Hole Ales Test
wHat hOle aLes tEst
whAt hoLe alEs teSt
whaT holE aleS tesT
Monday’s Quizzler is…….
Name the automobile makes:
1. river wading place
2. ringed planet
3. famous emancipator
4. weep convulsively
5. Star Wars action figure
6. earth wanderer
7. spotted cat
8. heavy metal
12. bawl + disparaging remark
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
http://www.slampi.org, http://www.hopeBUILD.org, http://www.GodLovesPraise.com, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com.
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com