WELCOME to Friday April 17, 2020
SOME GOOD ONES……
1. Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels good.
2. Talk is cheap because supply exceeds the demand.
3. Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
4. Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
5. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They both
should be changed regularly and for the same reason.
6. It’s easier to fight for ones’ principles than to live up to them.
7. I don’t mind going anywhere as long as it’s an interesting path.
8. Anything free is worth what you pay for it.
9. It hurts to be on the cutting edge.
10. If it ain’t broke, fix it till it is.
11. I don’t get even, I get older.
12. In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.
13. Dijon vu – the same mustard as before.
14. I am a nutritional overachiever.
15. My inferiority complex is not as good as yours.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people, stay inside, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
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Quotes of the Day
“My Grandmother is over eighty and still doesn’t
need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.” – Henny Youngman
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“I have only one superstition. I touch all
the bases when I hit a home run.” – Babe Ruth
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“The secret to creativity is knowing
how to hide your sources.” – Albert Einstein
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My childhood should have taught me lessons for
my own parenthood, but it didn’t because
parenting can be learned only by people who have no children.
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My father confused me. From the ages of
one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
On my way to a picnic, I stopped at a fast-food place to order a quart of potato salad.
“We don’t sell it by the quart,” the clerk snapped. “Okay, then give me two pints, please,”
I replied. I’m proud to say I held my tongue when she asked, “Do you want it in one container?”😱😳
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Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”
“Onara!”
Answer: “Con Air”
Oooh, it’s so bad it’s good…almost! The line is a play on the word “sayonara” meaning “goodbye” in case you hadn’t got it.
“Con Air” tells the tale of prisoners on a transport plane. Cameron Poe (Nicholas Cage), a former Ranger, is being released after serving time for killing a man. He’s on the same plane as lots of high-security prisoners being transferred to various other prisons. Cyrus “The Virus” (John Malkovich), however, has hatched a plan to take over the plane. Will good-guy Poe be able to stop him? What do you think? John Cusack and Steve Buscemi also star in this highly entertaining and not-to-be-taken-seriously film.
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Do you know what happens to a Toad when it gets struck by lightning?”
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Thursday’s Quizzler is….
Someone has stolen Beethoven’s Wig and has put it in one of four locked boxes. The boxes are numbered from 1,2,3,4 in that order. There are four different keys that each has their own color. Use the clues below to figure out which key goes in which box and to find the box where Beethoven’s wig is being kept.
1. The green key goes to the third or fourth box
2. The wig is to the left of the fourth box
3. The wig is to the right of the first box
4. The yellow key is to the left of the wig
5. The blue key is to the right of the yellow key and to the left of the green key
6. The red key goes to the first box
Answer: The wig is in the third box
The red key goes to the first box
The yellow key goes to the second box
The blue key goes to the third box
The green key goes to the fourth box
Friday’s Quizzler is…….
Mike Jones, a travel agent at the Bon Voyage travel agency, was mildly surprised when five college students stopped by his office last Saturday morning, since each booked his spring-break trip months ahead of time. Each student came into the store at a different time and booked a trip to a different destination via a different mode of transportation.
From the information provided, can you determine the time in the morning at which each student stopped by, as well as the destination and mode of transportation each chose?
1. Taylor came into the office at some point after the student who booked the trip to Miami. The student who booked a train ticket came in at 11:00 a.m.
2. The student who came in at 9:00 a.m. (who isn’t the one named Allen) booked the trip to Washington D.C.
3. Brian (who booked a rental car) came in exactly 30 minutes after Paul (who booked a trip to Orlando).
4. The student who booked a trip to the Virgin Islands via sailboat is not the one who came in at 10:30 a.m.
5. Dennis is not the one who booked a bus reservation
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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