Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to WEDNESDAY MAY 27, 2020
 
Amazing-but-True Facts! I don’t know how true this stuff is, but I do know that

they are really weird facts! Enjoy…..
– Polar bears can eat as many as 86 penguins
   in a single sitting.
– In the weightlessness of space a frozen pea
  will explode if it comes in contact with Pepsi.
– Smearing a small amount of dog feces on an insect
   bite will relieve the itching and swelling.
– The Boeing 747 is capable of flying upside-down if it weren’t for the fact
   that the wings would shear off when trying to roll it over.
– The trucking company Elvis Presley worked at as a
   young man was owned by Frank Sinatra.
– SCUBA divers cannot pass gas at depths of 33 feet or below.
– Human saliva has a boiling point three times that of regular water.
– The Venezuelan brown bat can detect and dodge individual raindrops
   in mid-flight, arriving safely back at his cave completely dry.
– Never hold your nose and cover your mouth when
  sneezing, as it can blow out your eyeballs.😳😁😁😁😁😎

– Every Labrador retriever dreams about bananas.

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL
WEDNESDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
___________________________________________
Quotes of the Day 
“Police in New York are looking for a woman known as the ‘Botox Bandit.’
She has been passing bad checks in order to get spa treatments. She
probably won’t be surprised when they catch her, but she will look surprised.”

– Jimmy Fallon
___________________________________________
“The U.S. has found over a trillion dollars of untapped mineral deposits
in Afghanistan. The great part is, the country comes pre-invaded.” – Jay Leno
___________________________________________
“I have particularly vivid memories of Iowa summers because my father
was the last person in the Midwest to buy an air conditioner. He thought
they were unnatural. He thought anything that cost more than $30 was
unnatural.” –Bill Bryson from “I’m a Stranger Here Myself”
 
___________________________________________ 
 
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
As a potential juror in an assault-and-battery case, I was sitting in a courtroom,
answering questions from both sides. The assistant district attorney asked such
questions as: Had I ever been mugged? Did I know the victim or the defendant?
The defense attorney took a different approach, however. “I see you are a teacher,”
he said. “What do you teach?”  “English and theater,” I responded. “I guess I better
watch my grammar,” the defense attorney quipped. “No,” I shot back. “You better
watch your acting.” When the laughter in the courtroom died down, I was excused
from the case. 😱😳😁😎
___________________________________________
 
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ” 
“You wanna know how to do it? Here’s how. They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of your

guys to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That’s the Chicago way,
Answer:  The Untouchables

Federal Agent Eliot Ness has vowed to take down Al Capone. In order to do this he must assemble a hand-picked group of men who can’t be bought by Capone’s money. One of his first choices is cop Jim Malone, who offers Ness this advice on how to achieve his goal. Sean Connery finally won an Academy Award for his performance as the street-wise Malone. Kevin Costner, Charles Martin Smith, Andy Garcia and Robert de Niro also starred under Brian de Palma’s direction.
 
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“She is already burnt flesh Adso. Bernardo Gui has spoken – she is a witch.” William of Baskerville

“But that’s not true, and you know it.” – Adso of Melk

“I know. I also know that anyone who disputes the verdict of an Inquisitor is guilty of heresy.” – William of Baskerville

 
___________________________________________ 
 
Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
 A name of a musical instrument is hidden in each of these phrases or sentences.

1. Which arm on Icarus held this instrument?
2. Man wearing kepi a novice player.
3. Orpheus carefully replaced ancient instrument.
4. Educator Gandhi played Bach.
5. No car in Asia has instrument aboard.
6. Instrument played in Olympic colorful parade.
7. Cancel long concert for stringed instrument.
8. Urban joke played on instrument.
9. Angelic playing with arpeggios.
10. Absolutely beautiful playing of stringed instrument.
Answer:  1. harmonica

2. piano
3. lyre
4. organ
5. ocarina
6. piccolo
7. cello
8. banjo
9. harp

10. lute

 
Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
​Four men met in a bar, and they soon found that all four of them had been to the Amazon Jungle. After a few more beers, they also realized that they had all been captured at least once, by fierce natives who ruled amazing fortresses. They soon got around to talking about their experiences, and their escapes. The first man said, “Well, I was once caught by natives who ruled a diamond palace. They caught me and took me to their king. He decreed that I was to die in one month. They threw me into a cell. Thank God that they didn’t take my equipment. I had stolen a quartz file from one of the natives. I filed away the bars (it had curtains so they couldn’t see) and escaped mere hours before I was to die.”

The second man said, “I was also captured, but they took me to a simple copper structure. I did not have any such luxury of a month to escape, instead, a single day. Luckily they did not count on my desperation, and I was able to claw my way out of there using only my fingernails and pure adrenaline.”
The third man said, “I was taken to the most amazing fortress of all. It was made out of black topaz. I was also the smartest of all of you,” he bragged, “for I had brought with me a steel file. I was out in a jiff, and I was able to steal some of the topaz as well,” he said as he showed everyone a piece of topaz hanging from a string around his neck.
The fourth man had been looking amused at the first and second men’s stories, but as the third man finished he threw up his head and laughed. The other three men were looking slightly peeved, and asked him what he found so funny. He declared that they were all liars, and he could prove it.

How could he prove it, and when did each of the three men lie?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.
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