Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to FRIDAY JUNE 12, 2020
  
 Thinking out loud……
* Money doesn’t bring you happiness, but it enables you to look for it in more places.
* Your conscience may not keep you from doing wrong, but it sure keeps you from enjoying it.
* Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
* Misers aren’t much fun to live with, but they make great ancestors.
* Be careful what rut you choose. You may be in it the rest of your life.
* The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
* When you see the handwriting on the wall, you can bet you’re in a public restroom.
* Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
* The real reason you can’t take it with you is that it goes before you do.
* Junk is something you throw away three weeks before you need it.
* Hospitality is making your guests feel at home, even if you wish they were.
* A closed mouth gathers no feet.
* A man (or woman) who can smile when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.
* A modern pioneer is a woman who can get through a rainy Saturday with a television on the blink.
* The world is full of willing people: some willing to work and some willing to let them.
* Money isn’t everything….there’s credit cards, money orders, and travelers’ checks.
Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT
WEEKEND people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
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Quotes of the Day 
“If women have excessive belly fat and a muffin-top, it can
be fatal. Especially if you mention it to her.” -Jay Leno😱
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“It’s hot in August. August got its name from the Roman emperor,
August. Augustus must have been a good emperor
because he got a whole month named after him. All
Julius Caesar got was a salad.” -Craig Ferguson
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“More Americans can name the three stooges than the three
branches of government. Well, that’s because the three
stooges are more likely to get something done.” -David Letterman 😁
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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
My father was extremely nervous about his first funeral service as a Navy chaplain,
but the undertaker assured him that he would prompt him. All went well until, at

the close, the undertaker whispered to him to instruct the family to come up and
view the body. “Will the family now come forward and pass around the bier,” said my
father. He cringed inwardly when he heard his own words. Later, as my father was
leaving, he overheard two of the cemetery workers talking. “I didn’t get any beer,”
one said. “Did you?” “You heard the chaplain,” the other replied. “It was just for the family.” 😱😁😎
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Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ” 
 “Pepperland is a tickle of joy on the blue belly of the universe. It must be scratched”?

Answer:  Yellow Submarine!

The quote does indeed come from the Beatles’ crazy animated romp, “Yellow Submarine”, in which John, Paul, George and Ringo agree to go to Pepperland in a Yellow Submarine to help the citizens fight off an attack on their lifestyle and homeland by the Blue Meanies. The leader of the Meanies is the one who says the quote from this question, showing his intolerance of anything joyful and fun. Of course the Fab Four have to come to the rescue. The other movies mentioned are colorful, but have nothing to do with the Beatles or the quote.
 
 
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“Mr. Spade, have you any conception of how much money can be got for that black bird?”
 
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Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
In a small cottage near the woods, five kittens were born. Their names were Purry, Whiskers, Mewler, Kiki, and Cayli. They each had different fur patterns, a certain favorite treat, and a secret hideout. There was a calico cat, a Siamese cat, a gray tabby cat, a black cat, and an orange cat. The foods they liked were one of the following: salmon, tuna, chicken, turkey, or shrimp. The places that they went to hide were the front porch, the forest, the roof, under the table, and behind the couch.

1. The kitten who often explored in the forest had a coat which allowed him to blend in with the shadows.
2. Purry liked to spy on the black cat from her secret hideout. She had a great view because of the height she had to climb to get to her hideout.
3. The two cats who liked fish liked to stay indoors. The two cats who liked poultry wanted to go outside but were afraid of the forest.
4. Cayli loved being outdoors, but she didn’t want to go too far away. She thought that Kiki and the Siamese cat were missing out on the sunlight.
5. Whiskers couldn’t stand the stench of shrimp and tuna.
6. The kitten with gray stripes bragged that she was the closest to the sun, but the orange cat believed that her spot allowed her to get plenty of sunlight.
7. Whenever the aroma of turkey reached her, Purry would quickly climb down and go back inside to get some.
8. The Siamese cat loved the fish that began with the same letter as his breed, and he would always sleep right beneath where this delicious fish was served.

Answer:  Purry was a gray tabby cat; she liked to eat turkey and climb up on the roof.

Whiskers was a Siamese cat; he liked to eat salmon and sleep under the table.
Kiki was a calico cat; she liked to eat tuna and hide behind the couch.
Mewler was a black cat; he liked to eat shrimp and go in the forest.

Cayli was an orange cat; she liked to eat chicken and sleep on the front porch. 

 
 
 
 
Friday’s Quizzler is…….
A museum has 5 wings: North, South, East, West, and Central. These wings are where the museum displays their traveling exhibits. One year 5 different exhibits came, each one to a different wing. From the clues below, determine the name of the traveling exhibit, what month it opened, how long it was on display, and what wing it was housed in.

1- East Wing hosted the Ancient Greek, an exhibition which opened later in the year than the one which lasted four months.
2- The first exhibit to go on display lasted for 3 months.
3- The exhibitions in North Wing opened in June.
4- Aztec was on display for a period of five months.
5- The six month touring exhibit was allocated to West Wing.
6- The exhibition starting in September ran for longer than the display of the Samurai.

7- The exhibition entitled Masada and Dead Sea Scrolls opened two months before the display in Central Wing; their duration differed by more than a month.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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