Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

Life’s Little Moments of Destruction…

The meek shall inherit the Earth after we’re done with it.
Just because you’re not paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you.
Money can’t buy happiness but it can certainly rent it for a couple of hours.
Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
Eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow they may make it illegal.
I’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
Don’t be so humble – you are not that great. — Golda Meir
Everyone needs belief in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
When in charge, ponder. When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.
Work is the curse of the drinking class.
I can tell you’re lying. Your lips are moving.
There’s nothing more restful than taking orders from fools.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
It’s hard to soar like an eagle when you’re surrounded by turkeys.
He who laughs last didn’t get the joke.
I’m not prejudiced. I hate everyone equally.
I used to be lost in the shuffle. Now I just shuffle along with the lost.

Yesterday was the deadline on all complaints.

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT
MONDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
Quotes of the Day 
Great spirits have always encountered violent 
opposition from mediocre minds. — Albert Einstein

To err is human. To forgive is unusual.
Attention to health is
life greatest hindrance. — Plato
Only those who attempt the
absurd can achieve the impossible.
I just broke up with someone and the last thing she
said to me was “You’ll never find anyone like me again!”
I’m thinking, “I should hope not! If I don’t want you,
why would I want someone like you.””😳

“I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand

a single word of what I am saying.” Oscar Wilde
“The best ideas come as jokes. Make your
thinking as funny as possible.”

– David M. Ogilvy
“I have learned that to be with
those I like is enough.”
– Walt Whitman
“Reading is to the mind what
exercise is to the body.”

– Sir Richard Steele

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
It seems that Mary Poppins has moved to California. She has 
started a business telling people’s fortunes. But, she doesn’t 
read palms or tea leaves, she smells one’s breath. That, right, 
the sign outside reads: Super California Mystic Expert Halitosis.😱😁😎 
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ” 
“I don’t know nothin’ ’bout birthin’ babies.”

Answer:  ‘Gone With The Wind’ 

The complete quote is “Lordy, we got to have a doctor. I don’t know nothin’ ’bout birthin’ babies’.” This quote has been parodied many times.
Miss Scarlett (Vivien Leigh) enlists the help of the house servant, Prissy (Butterfly McQueen), to help deliver Melanie’s (Olivia de Havilland) baby. McQueen had a very high-pitched voice and played the role of an uneducated, southern, black servant in the 1939 movie ‘Gone With The Wind’. She was not terribly proud of this role until much later in her life.
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“When you have to shoot, shoot. Don’t talk.”
Friday’s Quizzler is….​
I am a rock group that has 4 members, all of whom are dead, one of which was assassinated. What am I?

Answer:  Mt. Rushmore

Monday’s Quizzler is…….
If you like solving puzzles, periodically,

Then this may suit your particular body chemistry.
One is partly controversial but makes hard teeth with just a trace,
Two is notoriously poisonous and sometimes seen with old lace.
Three made the Hindenburg rise and fall disastrously from the sky,
Four is most essential, without Thyroxin you would surely die.
Five is up in the air and to life it is very dear.
Six is like your favorite pub, a lot to do with atmosphere.
Put us all together and we wield economic power,
A magazine? ; a dress ? ; a trend? ; I change by the hour.
What am I?


LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

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