Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to MONDAY JULY 27, 2020
SENIOR TEXTING…..

Since more and more Seniors are texting and tweeting, there appears to be a need
for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for Senior Discounts, this is the code for you.  Please pass this on to your CHILDREN and Grandchildren so they can understand your texts.
ATD: At The Doctor’s
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CGU: Can’t get up
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
FWBB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk’s On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
ROFL… CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing… And Can’t Get Up
TTML: Talk To Me Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?
WTP: Where’s The Prunes?
WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil

GGLKI: Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking In!!

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT
MONDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!  
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Quotes of the Day 
“A new study found that women’s faces age and wrinkle
just like their mothers. The study was conducted by the American

Society of Wrong Things to Say to Your Wife.” -Jimmy Fallon
______________________________________________
“Archeologists in Egypt now say it’s not true that the pyramids were
built by slaves. They say the pyramids were built by paid workers.
You know how they financed it? A pyramid scheme.” -Jay Leno
______________________________________________
“Some scholars of ancient Hebrew are now suggesting that
certain portions of the Bible could have been written centuries earlier
than others. The scholars say they know this because the newer
portions all begin, ‘Previously, on ‘The Bible.'” -Conan O’Brien

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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
My wife has not spoken to me in three days. I think it has something
to do with what happened on Sunday night when she thought she heard
a noise downstairs. She nudged me and whispered, “Wake up, wake up!”
“What’s the matter?” I asked. There are burglars in the kitchen. I think they’re
eating the tuna casserole, I made tonight.” “That’ll teach them!” I replied. 😁😎
 
 
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Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ” 
“Even a man who is pure in heart and says his prayers by night may become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms and the autumn moon is bright.”
Answer:    The Wolfman

In 1941, an old gypsy woman named Maleva (Maria Ouspenskaya) says the line to Larry Talbot (Lon Chaney Jr.) and she sees a symbol in the palm of his hand. He has just killed her son Bela (Bela Lugosi), a werewolf, but not before being bitten. Other movies with werewolves have changed the quote to “when the moon is shining bright” or “when the moon is full and bright” and “wolfbane” gets changed to “wolfsbane” in some. Maleva has another memorable quote in the movie – “The way you walked was thorny, through no fault of your own, but as the rain enters the soil, the river enters the sea, so tears run to a predestined end. Your suffering is over, Bela my son. Now you will find peace.”
 
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“There’s only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people’s cultures and the Dutch.”
 
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Friday’s Quizzler is….​
You are given five words and five definitions. Each of the words can be anagrammed into a two word phrase that fits one of the definitions. Your task is to assign each definition to its corresponding word. Example – cobalt: to hit a feline in a high arc (cat lob).

Words: archery, cavalier, foresight, tourniquet, watercress
Definitions:
an equine donated as a present
covert military conflicts
newton-meter or pound-foot
to perceive a wail

volcanic grain

Answer:  archery: to perceive a wail (hear cry)

cavalier: volcanic grain (lava rice)
foresight: an equine donated as a present (gift horse)
tourniquet: newton-meter or pound-foot (torque unit)

watercress: covert military conflicts (secret wars)

 
 
Monday’s Quizzler is…….
Each group of definitions describes three words that are spelled the same, except for one letter (each group describes a different set of words). Example: king, ring, wing. The length of the words in each group is provided.

1) a small bundle & a pointed stake for a fence & a small isolated area or group (6 letters)
2) to express in words & not freshly made & to look fixedly at something (5 letters)
3) a dance that conveys a story & a makeshift bed & a hammer-like implement (6 letters)
4) a local branch of a society & a mercantile lease of a ship & to talk incessantly (7 letters)

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. 

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