Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to THURSDAY AUGUST 27 2020

English is very Strange…..
Did you know that “verb” is a noun?
How can you look up words in a dictionary if you can’t spell them?
If a word is misspelled in a dictionary, how would we ever know?
If two mouses are mice and two louses are lice, why aren’t two houses hice?
If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?
If you’ve read a book, you can reread it. But wouldn’t this also mean that you would have to “member” somebody in order to remember them?
In Chinese, why are the words for crisis and opportunity the same?
Is it a coincidence that the only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable?
Is there another word for a synonym?
Shouldn’t there be a shorter word for “monosyllabic”?
What is another word for “thesaurus”?
Where do swear words come from?
Why can’t you make another word using all the letters in “anagram”?
Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
Why do people use the word “irregardless”?
Why do some people type “cool” as “kewl?”
Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
Why do we say something’s out of order when its broken but we never say in of order when it works?
Why does “cleave” mean both split apart and stick together?
Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?
Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?

Why does the Chinese ideogram for trouble symbolize two women living under one roof?

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT
THURSDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
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Quotes of the Day
our life is what your thoughts make it.

Marcus Aurelius
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Love is all we have, the only way that
each can help the other. Euripides
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The beginning is the most
important part of the work. Plato
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To sit in the shade on a fine day and
look upon verdure is the most perfect refreshment. Jane Austen
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Never put a sock in a toaster.
Eddie Izzard
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Wisdom begins in wonder. Socrates
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First love is only a little foolishness
and a lot of curiosity. George Bernard Shaw
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I decided that if I could paint that flower
in a huge scale, you could not ignore its beauty. Georgia O’Keeffe
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Men stumble over pebbles, never over mountains. Marilyn French
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I was the kid next door’s imaginary friend. Emo Philips

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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….  
A noted biologist, who had been studying little green frogs in a swamp, was stumped.
The frog population, despite efforts at predator control, was declining at an alarming rate. A chemist at a nearby college came up with a solution: The frogs, due to a chemical change in the swamp water, simply couldn’t stay coupled long enough to reproduce successfully.  The chemist then brewed up a new adhesive to assist the frogs’ togetherness, which included one-part sodium. It seems the little green frogs needed some monosodium glue to mate. 😁😎
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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
 “I want my mommy!”  “I’m all you got.”
Answer:   Kramer vs. Kramer

In the events just preceding these lines, newly-divorced father Ted Kramer (Dustin Hoffman) warns his young son Billy (Justin Henry) about eating ice-cream before dinner with the line “Hold it right there! You put that ice cream in your mouth and you are in very, very, VERY big trouble.” Of course, Billy does it anyway. After the resulting fight, Billy says the first line and Ted replies with the second. This famous scene was completely improvised by both Dustin Hoffman and Justin Henry and the director liked it so much he kept it in the final cut. In the 1980 Academy Awards, “Kramer vs. Kramer” won five Oscars, including Best Picture, Dustin Hoffman for Best Actor in a Leading Role and Meryl Streep for Best Actress in a Supporting Role.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
 “Sir, you are no gentleman.”  “And you, miss, are no lady.”
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Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
 An old fellow is driving home. It’s late at night. He’s travelling along the highway, and he’s some considerable distance from home. Suddenly, he feels himself having a heart attack. He says, “Oh my God. It’s the big one.” Thinking quickly, he takes the first available exit.

As luck would have it, he winds up in a residential neighborhood. It’s very late at night. He pulls over to the side of the road behind some parked cars. He’s fading fast, but he has the presence of mind to pull out his cell phone and call 911.
He says to the dispatcher, “I need help. I’m having a heart attack.” She says, “Where are you?”
And the rest of the conversation goes something like this:
He: “I don’t know where I am.”
She: “What exit did you take?”
He: “I don’t remember.”
She: “Were you going north or south or east?”
He: “I don’t remember.”
She: “Can you tell me what street you’re on?”
He: “I’m in the middle of the block. I’m parked behind some cars. I didn’t see any street signs.”
She: “Start blowing the horn. Someone will come out of the house.”
No one comes out.
She then asks him to do one more thing. Minutes later, an ambulance is on its way there and saves his life.

What did she ask him to do?

Answer:  She asked the man to give her the license plate number of the vehicle in front of him, thinking that whoever owned the vehicle lived in that neighborhood. Since it was a residential neighborhood, and late at night, this is very likely.
Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
Boys Billy, Lenny, and Samuel, and girls Jessica and Lindsay all go to the same school and take different classes. Each child got a different grade in a different class with a different teacher.

Kids: Billy, Lenny, Samuel, Jessica, and Lindsay
Teachers: Mr. Briggs, Mrs. Cooper, Mrs. Minn, Mr. Bobo, and Mrs. Runner
Grades: A, B, C, A-, and D
Subjects: Math, English, Science, History, and Physical Ed.
1. The 2 people who got A’s have names that end in Y.
2. The math student got a similar grade to Billy, but a little lower.
3. Mrs. Runner was sad to hand out a D to her student.
4. The C student loved her field trips, but isn’t a good test taker.
5. The Physical Education teacher is a male teaching a female, while the math teacher is female and teaches a male student.
6. Jessica and Lindsay didn’t get the highest or lowest grades out of the group; they got either a B or a C.
7. Mr. Bobo was the best Science teacher at the school, but Lenny didn’t have him.
8. Samuel really didn’t want to show his parents his report card because of the low grade he got from Mrs. Runner.

9. Mrs. Minn’s history class was the only class that had field trips and Lindsay loved them!

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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