Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

Here’s the Story….. Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there were two evil friars living outside this small village. The friars had tried unsuccessfully to overtake and capture the town, but finally this time, they believed they had hit upon a foolproof scheme that would allow them to rule the village. They had, through mad scientist experiments in their floral shop, come up with a plant that would devour the townspeople one by one until none were left. They set forth to put their plan into action by planting the man-eating plants so they encircled the village.
As the plants rapidly grew, they began devouring everything living in their path. The townspeople grew frightened; who or what would save them from their eminent doom? Finally, the town’s elder remember Hugh, a woodcutter who lived on the outskirts of town. Frantically, the townspeople penned a desperate plea for help, tied it to the leg of a pigeon, and directed the bird toward Hugh’s cabin.
Meanwhile, outside of town, Hugh had received the note from the townspeople, and realizing they were in grave danger, set forth to do what he needed to do. He honed his mightiest axe to razor-sharpness, grabbed his hat, and off he went.
Chopping his way through the dense vines, he single-handedly destroyed the carnivorous plants one by one, until all were destroyed. Then he set out to rid the village of the evil friars, chasing them out of town. The town was saved!!! The people rejoiced and knighted Hugh for his brave and timely efforts to save the village!!!
And the moral of the story is:
Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.    Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!  

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y  
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.  Lana Turner

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.Jerry Seinfeld

A word to the wise ain’t necessary – it’s the stupidones that need the advice.

All men are equal before fish.Herbert Hoover

Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.  

G u a r a n t e e d   t o   R o l l  Y o u r   E y e sAn elderly lady was well-known for her faith and for her boldness in talking about it. She would stand on her front porch and shout “PRAISE THE LORD!”  Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, “There ain’t no Lord!!”  Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for GOD to send her some assistance. She stood on her porch and shouted “PRAISE THE LORD. GOD I NEED FOOD!! I AM HAVING A HARD TIME. PLEASE LORD, SEND ME SOME GROCERIES!!” The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, “PRAISE THE LORD.” The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, “Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn’t.”  The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, “PRAISE THE LORD. He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them. Praise the Lord! 😁

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”  “Well, the DA defines murder as one human killing another, so, technically, you can’t commit murder, can you?” “Does this make us friends?” 
Answer:  I, RobotIn the events leading up to this scene (set on future Earth in 2035), the body of renowned robotic scientist Dr. Alfred Lanning (James Cromwell) has been found in the lobby of the U.S. Robotics building in Chicago and he is thought to have committed suicide. But Detective Del Spooner (Will Smith) suspects it may be murder, not suicide, and begins to investigate the situation. A robot with special talents named Sonny (Alan Tudyk) emerges as a prime suspect and Det. Spooner enlists the aid of psychologist Dr. Susan Calvin (Bridget Moynahan), who specializes in the psyches of robots, to help him understand how the Three Laws of Robotics could have been violated. In this scene Sonny confesses to the murder but says Dr. Lanning made him promise to do it. When Sonny asks, “Are you going to arrest me, Detective?” Spooner replies with line one. Sonny then replies with line two. In the 2005 Academy Awards “I, Robot” was nominated for the Oscar for Best Achievement in Visual Effects but lost to “Spider-Man 2.” The scene where Sonny is hiding in a large group of NS-5 robots standing at attention came from the Isaac Asimov story “Little Lost Robot.” Asimov is considered a master of the science-fiction genre and has written or edited more than five hundred science-fiction books. The Three Laws of Robotics are his creation.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????“I just wanted to tell you I’m your number one fan.” “That’s… very sweet of you.”

Friday’s Quizzler is….​Two old friends, Fred and Ted, had managed to work a party piece that no one could figure out. Fred would go out of the room, and Ted would invite the guests to select an item. They were then asked to continue to think of it so that Fred could read their minds. Fred would be blindfolded so that there could be no possibility of visual clues. Ted would then start to ask Fred questions:
On one occasion Ted asked:”Did we think of the word sock?””Absolutely not.” replied Fred.”Well, was it an ashtray?””No.””OK, is it the word plate?”Again the answer was negative.”So, are we thinking of the word china?””No.” replied Fred.”Are we thinking of the word carpet?””No,” replied Fred, ” the word you are thinking of is chair.”
Everyone gasped. He was right.
How did Fred and Ted work their party piece?
Answer:  It is simply the third letter of each item selected spells the answer.soCk

Monday’s Quizzler is…….From wood it’s made,From string it’s made,It floats upon the wind.It’s made by one,It’s made by many,From hands and mouths it spins.A score without a game.A staff not for the lame.With seven letters tamed.With five letters named

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at, WEBSITE LINKS:,, THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

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