Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to THURSDAY SEPTEMBER 17, 2020
Evaluating progress…….  

A keen analyst: Thoroughly confused.
Accepts new job assignments willingly: Never finishes a job.
Active socially: Drinks heavily.
Alert to company developments: An office gossip.
Approaches difficult problems with logic: Finds someone else to do the job.
Average: Not too bright.
Bridge builder: Likes to compromise.
Character above reproach: Still one step ahead of the law.
Charismatic: No interest in any opinion but his own.
Competent: Is still able to get work done if supervisor helps.
Conscientious and careful: Scared.
Consults with co-workers often: Indecisive, confused, and clueless.
Consults with supervisor often: Very annoying.
Delegates responsibility effectively: Passes the buck well.
Demonstrates qualities of leadership: Has a loud voice.
Displays excellent intuitive judgement: Knows when to disappear.
Displays great dexterity and agility: Dodges and evades superiors well.
Enjoys job: Needs more to do.
Excels in sustaining concentration but avoids confrontations: Ignores everyone.
Excels in the effective application of skills: Makes a good cup of coffee.
Exceptionally well qualified: Has committed no major blunders to date.
Expresses self well: Can string two sentences together.
Gets along extremely well with superiors and subordinates alike: A coward.    

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!  

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y  
I plan on living forever. So far, so good. Author Unknown

Ability is what will get you to the top if the boss has no daughter. Author Unknown

Love your enemies. It makes them so darned mad. P.D. East

As to the Seven Deadly Sins, I deplore Pride, Wrath, Lust, Envy and Greed. Gluttony and Sloth I pretty much plan my day around. Robert Brault.

I usually lump organized religion, organized labor, and organized crime together. The Mafia gets points for having the best restaurants. Dave Beard

There’s no such thing as fun for the whole family. Jerry Seinfeld

The universe is merely a fleeting idea in God’s mind – a pretty uncomfortable thought, particularly if you’ve just made a down payment on a house. Woody Allen

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes. Douglas Adams      

G u a r a n t e e d   t o   R o l l  Y o u r   E y e s It was many years ago since the embarrassing day when a young woman, with a baby in her arms, entered his butcher shop and confronted him with the news that the baby was his and asked what was he going to do about it? Finally he offered to provide her with free meat until the boy was 16. She agreed.
He had been counting the years off on his calendar, and one day the teenager, who had been collecting the meat each week, came into the shop and said, “I’ll be 16 tomorrow.”
“I know,” said the butcher with a smile, “I’ve been counting too, tell your mother, when you take this parcel of meat home, that it is the last free meat she’ll get, and watch the expression on her face.”
When the boy arrived home he told his mother. The woman nodded and said, “Son, go back to the butcher and tell him I have also had free bread, free milk, and free groceries for the last 16 years and watch the expression on his face!”  😱

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”    “Can we open up the window, professor? It’s hot in here.”  “Your comfort comes second to my ability to hear my own voice.” 

Answer:  A Beautiful MindThis movie tells the true story of brilliant math prodigy John Nash, Jr. (Russell Crowe) and how he overcame years of suffering from schizophrenia to win a Nobel Prize. In this scene at his job teaching a college class at MIT, he has shut the classroom windows to cut down on the noise from a construction crew just outside his building. It’s a hot day and one of his students asks line one. Nash replies with line two. My favorite line from this movie is from his Nobel Prize acceptance speech, when he looks at his wife Alicia (Jennifer Connelly) in the audience and says, “You are the reason I am. You are all my reasons.” In the 2002 Academy Awards “A Beautiful Mind” won four Oscars, including Best Picture. Jennifer Connelly won an Oscar for Best Actress in a Supporting Role and Ron Howard won an Oscar for Best Director. Russell Crowe was nominated for Best Actor (but lost to Denzel Washington in “Training Day”). Strictly speaking, there is no Nobel Prize in mathematics. The prize Nash won was in economics (although that category was not created in Alfred Nobel’s will and was added in 1969).

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???? “I want to say one word to you. Just one word.”  “Yes, sir.”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​ The wind eased itself gently through Captain Sheba’s hair as he pressed his eye against his spy glass. “Land! At last we are rich!” he shouted to his crew members. They anchored not very far away from the strange little island, rowed toward the shore and arrived safely. “Brethren, we’ve found the island. From the information we have so far, the treasure is hidden under one of these colored rocks on the shore and the rest of the rocks have a poisonous gas trapped beneath them. Alas, I can’t afford to lose any of my crew members. If we could only decode the last part of these writings, we would know which rock the treasure is under. I will give ten percent of the find to anyone who is able to decode this last message!”

At the end of your power
At the beginning of eternity
Blessed is he who finds me
He who still exists after uncovering me
To enjoy my riches forever
My last is in mud somewhere wherever

That’s all the writings say. There are four rocks. They are blue, red, white, and black respectively. Which one has the treasure hidden under it?


Answer:  The Red rock!At the end of power is R.
At the beginning of eternity is E.My last is in mud somewhere, so it has to be D. 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……. Three women (Dana, Barbara, & Ellen) and two men (Ben & Max) went to dinner at their favorite restaurant to celebrate the engagement of two of their friends. Each ordered a different entree (shrimp & pasta, chicken cordon bleu, vegetable medley, fillet mignon, & NY strip steak), and a different dessert (fudge cake, vanilla ice cream, apple crisp, chocolate cream pie, & strawberry parfait). Can you determine each person’s full name and what entree and dessert they ordered?
1) Nobody’s first name starts with the same letter as their last name.
2) Klein and Bronson are dating.
3) Ms. Mathers is a vegetarian.
4) The 5 friends are the man who ordered fudge cake, the one who ordered chicken cordon bleu, Ellen, the woman who ordered fillet mignon, and Mr. Klein (who ordered ice cream).
5) Mr. Klein and Dana shared their desserts.
6) Delaney and Ruiz are engaged. Neither of them ordered beef.
7) Ben does not care for chocolate and is allergic to strawberries.
8) Delaney did not order chocolate cream pie or apple crisp for dessert.
9) Ben and Ruiz have been friends since high school, and were laughing over dinner about how they have always liked the same girls, until Barbara came along.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:http://www.slampi.org, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com.CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

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