Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the organ of the species.
Benjamin Franklin produced electricity by rubbing cats backwards.
The theory of evolution was greatly objected to because it made man think.
Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillar’s.
The process of turning steam back into water again is called conversation.
The Earth makes one resolution every 24 hours.
To collect fumes of sulfur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube.
Algebraical symbols are used when you do not know what you are talking about.
The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.
Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.
A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.
A triangle which has an angle of 135 degrees is called an obscene triangle.
When you haven’t got enough iodine in your blood you get a glacier.
For fractures: to see if the limb is broken, wiggle it gently back and forth.
To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.
For asphyxiation: apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead.
When you smell an odorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide. 
Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!Peace, I am  outta here!  Eucman!  

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y  
 “Starbucks yesterday announced plans to build 10,000 eco-friendly stores by 2025, which means America will have to add more street corners.” -Seth Meyers 

“Weight Watchers announced it’s changing its name. They’ve changed their name to ‘Screw It, Have the Fudge.'” -Conan O’Brien

  “Psychologists now believe that adulthood begins at 25, not 18. They also believe that middle age begins the first time you eat at a Denny’s while sober.” -Conan O’Brien

“A team of scientists recently completed an experimentstudying the effects of the drug MDMA on octopuses. Which is part of a bigger experiment of what happens when you give scientists LSD.” -Seth Meyers

“The 2020 Olympics are in Tokyo, and I saw that Japan wants to light the Olympic Torch with a flying car. Whether it works or not, by the end of the ceremony, something will be on fire.” -Jimmy Fallon

G u a r a n t e e d   t o   R o l l  Y o u r   E y e s! Frequent hand washing in my job as a medical technologist and the harsh weather combined give me very dry skin. One night as I prepared for bed, I rubbed my hands with petroleum jelly and covered them with an old pair of white gloves. As I sat in bed reading a book with my gloves on, my husband finished showering and came into the room wearing a towel. Drying himself off, he went to the closet, selected a tie and put it on. “What are you doing?” I asked.
“Well” he replied, “if you are going to be formal. So am I.”😁😎 

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”      “I’ll have what she’s having” 

Answer:  When Harry Met Sally In the 1989 movie “When Harry Met Sally”, Estelle Reiner (Carl’s wife and director Rob Reiner’s mother) spoke the line as a customer in a restaurant where Harry (Billy Crystal) and Sally (Meg Ryan) were eating. Harry and Sally argue over whether men and women can ever have a strictly platonic relationship. Sally fakes an orgasm, and that’s when the line is said by another diner. When they meet up ten years later, they again attempt to answer this question. Do they or don’t they? The other movie choices all had famous quotes: from Rick Blaine in “Casablanca” (1942), Mr. Miyagi in “The Karate Kid” (1984) and Harry Lime in “The Third Man” in 1949.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“Travelling through space ain’t like dusting crops boy.”

Monday’s Quizzler is….​ Which one of the following does not belong with the others?
Binoculars, eyeglasses, goggles, handlebars, jeans, pliers, scissors, shoes, tweezers
Answer:  The word “shoes” is the only “pair” that actually has 2 separate pieces. 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……. Can you take three letters away from a four-letter word and manage to have it mean the same thing?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:http://www.slampi.org, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com.CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

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