Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Food Laffs….
From Harper’s Magazine: Amount of pizza eaten each day in U.S. (acres): 75

Found on the seal of a bag of bagels: NEW, IMPROVED, Made the old-fashioned way

Sign in a restaurant: “We reserve the right to serve refuse to anyone.”

Heard on a radio station.What did the female mushroom say about the male mushroom?
“He’s a real fun guy [fungi].”

Q: Ever wonder about people who pay $2 for a bottle of Evian water? A: Just spell “Evian” backwards! 

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT
WEEKEND people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here!  Eucman!  

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y  

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. — Albert Einstein  

To err is human. To forgive is unusual.  

Attention to health is life greatest hindrance. — Plato  

Only those who attempt the absurd can achieve the impossible.  

G u a r a n t e e d   t o   R o l l  Y o u r   E y e s! This Kentucky horse breeder had a filly that won every race in which she was entered. But as she got older she became very temperamental. He soon found that when he raced her in the evening, she would win handily, but when she raced during the day she would come in dead last. He consulted the top veterinarians and horse psychologists to no avail. He finally had to give up because it had become a real night mare. 😳😁😎 

Thursdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”     “I’ve always known I’ll die ALONE”

Answer:  “Star Trek V: The Final Frontier” 
From “Star Trek V: The Final Frontier”, Captain James T. Kirk gives us this quote to retroactively explain why he was so sure he would successfully get out of a dangerous rock climbing situation during a Yosemite shore leave – he was with his friends so, according to his beliefs, he could not be not in any mortal danger. Ultimately, Kirk is proven wrong as he would die in “Star Trek: Generations” (the seventh movie of the series) after fighting Soran, in the arms of his 24th century successor, Captain Jean-Luc Picard.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“All you’ve ever NEEDED has always been right inside you”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​ Why did the old lady always answer the door wearing her hat and coat?
If it was someone she wanted to invite in, she’d say that she had just come in. If it was someone she did not want to invite in, then she’d say she was just about to go out. 

Friday’s Quizzler is…….Below are incomplete words. Replace the letters in each bracket so that you can complete the word on the left and begin the word on the right. Good luck.
Indivi ( _ _ _ _ ) ityDin ( _ _ _ ) veCan ( _ _ _ ) larBru ( _ _ _ ) lyL ( _ _ _ ) litude

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at, WEBSITE LINKS:,, THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

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