Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Miscellaneous terms……..

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOUR: A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

GOSSIP: A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.


INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MYTH: A female moth.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW: One of the greatest labour saving devices of today.

YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL
WEDNESDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

Your life is what your thoughts make it.
Marcus Aurelius

Love is all we have, the only way
that each can help the other. Euripides

The beginning is the most
important part of the work. Plato

To sit in the shade on a fine day and
look upon verdure is the most
perfect refreshment. Jane Austen

Wisdom begins in wonder. Socrates

First love is only a little foolishness
and a lot of curiosity. George Bernard Shaw

I decided that if I could paint that flower
in a huge scale, you could not
ignore its beauty. Georgia O’Keeffe

Men stumble over pebbles, never
over mountains. Marilyn French

“You can’t deny laughter. When it comes, it plops down
in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.” Stephen King

“I have found that if you love life, life will love you
back.” – Arthur Rubinstein

“It’s all right letting yourself go as long as you can let
yourself back.” – Mick Jagger

G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s!
A prominent Polish scientist conducted very important experiment. He trained a flea
to jump upon giving her a verbal command (“Jump!”). In a first stage of experiment
he removed flea’s leg, told her to jump, and the flea jumped. So he wrote in his scientific
notebook: “Upon removing one leg all flea organs function properly.” So, he removed
the second leg, asked the flea to jump, she obeyed, so he wrote again: “Upon removing
the second leg all flea organs function properly.” Thereafter he removed all the legs but
one, the flea jumped when ordered, so he wrote again: “Upon removing the next leg all
flea organs function properly.” Then he removed the last leg. Told flea to jump, and
nothing happened. He did not want to take a chance, so he repeated the experiment
several times, and the leg less flea never jumped. So he wrote the conclusion: “Upon
removing the last leg the flea loses sense of hearing” 😱

Tuesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Grace? She passed away 30 years ago!”?

Answer: National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
Asking Aunt Bethany to ‘say grace’ for the meal, the family waited patiently while what’s wanted was explained to her. In the end, the family joined with Aunt Bethany in a hearty rendition of the U.S. ‘Pledge of Allegiance’ and the feast began!

In this 1989 movie, “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation”, Clark Griswold, (played by Chevy Chase) tried to create the perfect family Christmas get-together. However, he was frustrated by his not-so-perfect family, and a sequence of mishaps mar the occasion.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“…Chief, you’re about as big as a […] mountain!”


Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
See if you can figure out three words that are homophones of each other in each of the five problems below.

  1. Worthless – flat piece moving with the air – blood vessel
  2. Path or direction – to measure weight – watery part of milk
  3. Having no money – careful study; microscopic hole – to flow freely
  4. Warty frog – having toes – pulled ahead
  5. A cry – welt; corduroy ridge – large oceanic mammal

Answer: 1. Vain – vane – vein 2. Way – weigh – whey

3. Poor – pore – pour

4. Toad – toed – towed

5. Wail – wale – whale

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
In each group below, the three words end in the same three letters, so they look like they should rhyme, but they don’t. See if you can figure out the missing letters in each group.
Example: plo___, tho___, to___ would be plough, though, tough.

  1. eng___, f___, mar___
  2. c___, car___, s___
  3. ag___, g___, h___

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,


CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

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