WELCOME to FRIDAY NOVEMBER 13, 2020

Great truths about life that adults have learned.

1.Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.

2. There is always a lot to be thankful for if you take the time to look.
   For example: I’m sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don’t hurt.
3. One reason to smile is that every seven minutes of every day someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.
4. Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due.
5. The best way to keep kids at home is to make a pleasant atmosphere and let the air out of their tires.
6. Families are like fudge….mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
7. Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground.
8. Laughing helps. It’s like jogging on the inside.
9. Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
10. My mind not only wanders; sometimes it leaves completely.
11. If you can remain calm, you just don’t have all the facts.

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT
WEEKEND people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important
to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.” George Carlin

“The two most common elements
in the universe are Hydrogen
and stupidity.” Harlan Ellison

“Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali.
He was using a dotted line.
He caught every other fish.” Steven Wright

G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s!
An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came
upon a casket containing a mummy, a rather rare occurrence in Israel,
to say the least. After examining it, he called the curator of the Israel
museum in Jerusalem. “I’ve just discovered a 3,000-year-old mummy
of a man who died of heart failure!” the excited scientist exclaimed.
To which the curator replied, “Bring him in. We’ll check it out.” A week
later, the amazed curator called the archaeologist. “You were right about
both the mummy’s age and cause of death. How in the world did you know?”
“Easy. There was a piece of paper in his hand that said, ‘10,000 Shekels on Goliath.'” 😁😎

Thursdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“It came to me. My own. My love. My own. My precious.”

Answer: The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
“The Fellowship of the Ring” is the first installment in Peter Jackson’s high fantasy film trilogy based on the novels by J.R.R. Tolkien. The story revolves around the formation of a fellowship of nine, who start out on an epic journey to return the One Ring to Mordor, where it must be destroyed. The scene described in the question plays out in film’s opening. As is only later divulged in “The Return of the King”, Gollum, or Smeagol as he was then called, was at first sight enchanted by the Ring of Power. The Ring had only just been recovered from a riverbed by his relative, Deagol, after being lost for two and a half thousand years. Smeagol was so ensnared that he snuffed the life out of Deagol to claim ownership. Gollum would henceforth refer to the Ring as his Precious.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“They call me MR TIBBS!”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
Dead on the field lie ten soldiers in white,
felled by three eyes, black as night.
What’s going on here?

Answer: A strike was thrown in 10 pin bowling.

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
I have been many things in my life.
To England I traveled during times of strife.

I owned a printing shop and made its periodicals popular.
Many enjoyed my views and called me a philosopher.

I loved inventing and in the field of science I strove.
Some of my inventions were bifocal eyeglasses, the glass harmonica and even a stove.

Many public offices have I held and served long,
Not the least of which, was reorganizing the postal system and making it strong.

Thanks to my love for travel, debates and tendency to chat,
I earned the title of diplomat.

I spent many times in England, that’s a fact.
I defended American rights and fought for repeal of the Stamp Act.

My ability to write and strong belief that all men are created equal caused me to help design
A Declaration of Independence, on which the original I did sign.

Be original, a thinker, give it a try.
Can you figure out my name; who am I?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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