Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Bumper Stickers…….

“Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately, it kills all it’s students!”

“According to my calculations the problem doesn’t exist.”

“Pride is what we have. Vanity is what others have.”

“How Can I Miss You if You Won’t Go Away?”

Seen on a woman’s car: “Men call us birds, we pick up worms”

“Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.”

“Give me ambiguity or give me something else.”

“Why is ‘abbreviation’ such a long word?”

“I like you, but I wouldn’t want to see you working with sub-atomic particles.”

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL
people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A helping word to one in trouble is like
a switch in a railroad track…an inch between
wreck and smooth, rolling prosperity.” -Henry Ward Beecher

“All animals, except man, know that the
principle business of life is to enjoy it.” -Samuel Butler

“All mankind is divided into three classes: those
who are immovable, those who are movable;
and those who move.” -Benjamin Franklin

A good sermon should be like a woman’s skirt: short
enough to rouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials.

A successful marriage requires falling in
love many times, always with the
same person. Mignon McLoughlin

What greater thing is there for two human souls, than
to feel that they are joined for life – to strengthen each
other in all labor, to rest on each other in all sorrow, to
minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each
other in silent unspeakable memories at the moment
of the last parting? George Eliot

G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s!
A Mexican restaurant I pulled up to looked great. Only one problem:
It wasn’t open. So I jotted down the name for another day. Just then,
a man came out of the restaurant and took a peek at what I’d written.

“That’s not the name of the restaurant,” he said, pointing to the sign
over the door. “That’s Spanish for ‘Closed on Mondays.'” 😁😎

Fridays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Think ya used enough dynamite there, Butch? “

Answer: “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid”
This scene was just before another train arrived, delivering lawman Joe Lefors and his men to hunt down Butch and Sundance (“Who are those guys?”). “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” (directed by George Roy Hill) also starred Katharine Ross, Strother Martin, Cloris Leachman and Ted Cassidy. The film was nominated for seven Oscars (including Best Picture, Director, and Sound), winning four (Original Score, Music (Original Song), Cinematography and Original Screenplay).

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“Well, there’s something you don’t see every day.”

Friday’s Quizzler is….​
Diana has been writing poetry for many years and is excited that her first published book of poems will be coming out next year. Her publisher has asked her to write introductions for her poems. From the information given below, can you determine the year each poem was written (1996, 1999, 2001, 2004, or 2009), the occasion or person it was written for, and the style of poetry used (haiku, ode, sonnet, elegy, or free verse)?

  1. “The Tree” was either the earliest poem written or the most recent. The wedding poem was either an ode or a free verse poem. “Dancer” is a haiku but was not written for the contest that took place in the 1990s.
  2. “Summer Harvest” was written for a family member. “Queen Anne” was inspired by a television show about British royalty and was not written in free verse.
  3. The five poems, in no particular order, are: “Confidential”, the free verse poem written in 1996, the sonnet, the poem written for her sister, and the poem written for her mother.
  4. The poem written for a friend’s wedding was written before the sonnet but three years after the haiku.
  5. The poem written in 1999 was written for her mother’s funeral. The ode was not written for her sister nor was it inspired by the television show.

Answer: “The Tree” was written in 1996 for a contest and is a free verse poem.
“Summer Harvest” was written in 1999 for her mother’s funeral and is an elegy.
“Dancer” was written in 2001 for her sister and is a haiku.
“Confidential” was written in 2004 for a friend’s wedding and is an ode.
“Queen Anne” was written in 2009 after watching a television show and is a sonnet.

Monday’s Quizzler is…….
Some people believe that January 1, 2000 is the first day of the 21st century. Other people believe that the honor belongs to January 1, 2001. But everyone should agree that January 1, 2002 is the first “sum-day” of the new century- when you write out that date in standard notation, it becomes 01/01/02, and 1+1=2. More generally, a sum-day is a date in which the day and month add up to the year. With that in mind:

A) What is the last sum-day of the 21st century?

B) How many sum-days are there in the 21st century?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in NEXT FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,


CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

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