Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to FRIDAY JANUARY 22, 2021

Here’s the story…..
According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated, “Wash. Biol. Surv.” until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper: “Dear Sirs: While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you it was horrible.”

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT
WEEKEND people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes,
and it’s our job to stomp on them and keep them in
the dark until they mature into something which you’d l
ike to have dinner with.” -Anonymous woman

On duty as a customer-service rep for a car-rental company,
I took a call from a driver who needed a tow. He was stranded
on a busy highway, but he didn’t know the make of the car
he was driving. I asked again for a more detailed description
beyond a “blue, four-door sedan.”
“It’s the one on fire,” he replied.

“My ten-year-old daughter asked me what a colon was and I
explained that it was a part of the body that food goes through
before being eliminated. Then she asked me what a semicolon
was and I told her that it was a colon the size of a
truck with eighteen wheels.” 😱😁😎

G u a r a n t e e d to Make You Laugh!
WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (actual AP headline) Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego,
was visiting her inlaws, and while there, she went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries.

Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with
both hands behind the back of her head. One customer who had been at the store for a while became
concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda’s eyes were now open, and she looked
very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she’d been shot in the back of the
head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.

The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda
refused to remove her hands from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a
wad of bread dough on the back of her head.

A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot,
and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head. When she reached back to find out what it was,
she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and
tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid. 😳😁😎

Thursdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“My father is no different than any powerful man, any man with power, like a president or senator.”

Answer: The Godfather
In this scene Michael Corleone (Al Pacino) is talking to his girlfriend, Kay Adams (Diane Keaton) near Kay’s New Hampshire school after Michael’s return from Sicily. He is trying to persuade her to marry him. When Michael tells Kay, “I’m working for my father now, Kay. He’s been sick — very sick,” she says, “But you’re not like him, Michael. I thought you weren’t going to become a man like your father. That’s what you told me.” Then Michael says line one and Kay responds with line two. Michael then says, “Oh. who’s being naive, Kay?”

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“You’re a wizard. “”I’m a what?”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
Construction of a stronger and more massive bell tower for the monastery to replace the one destroyed during the last civil strife with a neighboring lord was well underway when the old Monk visited the site. The Abbot showed the Monk the drawings and model for the three-bell tower. The Monk was impressed until he stood where the bell chamber would be and saw the spiral staircase in this medieval bell tower running the wrong direction (counterclockwise).

“The staircase direction must be changed,” said the Old Monk. The Abbot looked at the staircase and agreed. Why?

Answer: Spiral staircases in medieval castles, towers and Keeps were run clockwise. This is because all knights used to be right-handed. When the intruding army would climb the stairs they would not be able to use their right hand, which was holding the sword because of the difficulties of climbing the stairs, giving clear advantage to the defenders. Many of the orders of clergy had military training in order to defend monasteries and Abbeys during the middle ages.

Left-handed knights would have had no troubles, except left-handed people could never become knights because it was assumed that they were descendants of the devil.

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
It’s true I bring serenity,
And hang around the stars,
But yet I live in misery,
You’ll find me behind bars.
With thieves and villains I consort,
In prison I’ll be found,
But I would never go to court,
Unless there’s more than one.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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