WELCOME to FRIDAY MARCH 19, 2021
Just Jokes today….
“Well, I’m sure everybody here already knows about Murphy’s
Law…but you guys probably don’t know about Cole’s law, am I right?”
“What’s Cole’s Law?” “It’s thinly sliced cabbage. Sometimes it has vinaigrette or mayonnaise.”
“I didn’t know my dad was a construction site thief,
but when I got home all the signs were there.”
“I’ll never forget my grandfather’s last words to me before he kicked
the bucket. He looked me in the eyes and said, ‘Son, how far do
you think I can kick this bucket?'” —Rockatelli
“How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm?”
“Look for the fresh prints.”
“A man is at the funeral of an old friend. He approaches the dead
man’s wife, and asks if he could say a word. The wife says that yes,
he could. The man stands up, clears his throat, and says ‘Plethora.’
The wife smiles, and says ‘Thank you, that means a lot.'”
“What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?”
“I don’t know and I don’t care.”
Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other
was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while
Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking
for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. Then he started looking in and under cars
until a police man approached him and asked, “What are you doing?” “Playing a game,” the
boy replied. “What is your name?” the officer questioned. “Mind Your Own Business.” Furious
the policeman inquired, “Are you looking for trouble?!” The boy replied, “Why, yes.”😁
That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.”
He who laughs last didn’t get the joke.
Charles de Gaulle
Be careful about reading health books.
Some fine day you’ll die of a misprint.
The trouble with having an open mind, of course,
is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.
In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.
Life in a box is better than no life at all, I expect. You’d
have a chance at least. You could lie there thinking: Well, at least I’m not dead.
Do not take life too seriously, you will never get out of it alive.
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women
marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful,
so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so
they don’t forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream.
“You might want to write it down,” she said. The husband said, “No, I can remember that you want a
bowl of ice cream.” She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream.
“Write it down,” she told him, and again he said, “No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice cream
with whipped cream.” Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a
cherry on top. “Write it down,” she told her husband and again he said, “No, I got it. You want a bowl of
ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top.” So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually
long time in the kitchen, over 30 minutes. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate of eggs and bacon.
The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, “Where’s the toast?”😁
Thursdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“I’ll have what she’s having.”
Answer: When Harry Met Sally…
Released in 1989, “When Harry Met Sally…” was directed by Rob Reiner and stars Billy Crystal as Harry Burns and Meg Ryan as Sally Albright. The title characters first meet in 1977, when they share a ride to New York City following their graduation from the University of Chicago. During the drive they have a conversation about whether or not a man and a women can have a truly platonic relationship, Sally thinks it’s possible, while Harry doesn’t believe it is, saying, “the sex part gets in the way”. After arriving in New York they agree to disagree and go their separate ways. But as in most romantic comedies, they eventually fall in love and live happily ever after. The quote comes from a scene at Katz’s Delicatessen in Manhattan, where Harry and Sally are having lunch. After Sally demonstrates how easy it is to fake an orgasm, a woman in the deli, played by the director’s mother Estelle Reiner, delivers the line. Katz’s still has a sign hanging above the table where the two sat which reads, “Where Harry Met Sally…Hope You Have What She Had!”
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“I’m walking here! I’m walking here!”
Thursday’s Quizzler is….
I, at the start, am old
Many centuries I’ve been told
Used by the Greeks
For counting techniques
After things were bought and sold
Later is when I became known
As an infinite figure, when shown
You’ve counted my spaces
Over two billion places
And still, my amount is unknown
I, too, am not young
I’m almost as old as Thing 1
I’m just a frog
On the natural log
But I can make counting fun
(Thing 1 and Thing 2)
When you combine us two
In the order of Thing 1 and Thing 2
We’ll be a baked treat
That’s painful to beat
Whether cherry, peach, or aloo
Answer: Thing 1 is “Pi.”
Thing 2 is “e,” the base of the natural logarithm.
Thing 1 and 2 are, together, “Pie.”
(an aloo pie is a potato pie)
Friday’s Quizzler is…….
What is the meaning of this rebus?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.