Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!



Avoid alliteration. Always.

Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

Avoid cliches like the plague. (They’re old hat.)

Employ the vernacular.

Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.

It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

Contractions aren’t necessary.

Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

One should never generalize.

Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”

Comparisons are as bad as cliches.

Don’t be redundant; don’t use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.

Be more or less specific.

Understatement is always best.

One-word sentences? Eliminate.

Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

The passive voice is to be avoided.

Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

Who needs rhetorical questions?

Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“I was not a child prodigy, because a child prodigy is a child who
knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows up.”
–Will Rogers

“I haven’t slept for ten days, because that would be too long.”
–Mitch Hedberg

“The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.”
–Ralph Waldo Emerson

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
The TV game show was really close. One contestant was asked to name 2 of Santa’s reindeer.
The contestant gave a sigh thinking that he had finally been given an easy question, “Rudolph and Olive!”
The host asked the contestant, “We’ll accept Rudolph but can you explain Olive?”
The man looked at the host and said, “You know, ‘Olive,’ the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names…” 😳

Tuesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“You killed an elected official?” “Who elected him?”

Answer: Gangs of New York!
This movie is set in New York City, in the mid 1800s (around the time of the U.S. Civil War and Tammany Hall political corruption). In the events leading up to this scene, the young son of a gang leader disappears after his father is killed by Bill “The Butcher” Cutting (Daniel Day-Lewis), after an especially bloody clash between two gangs in the Five Points area in 1862. Years later, the grown up boy (Leonardo DiCaprio) returns to the Five Points to seek vengeance against his father’s killer. In this scene Tammany Hall’s “Boss” Tweed (Jim Broadbent) is dismayed to learn Bill “the Butcher” has just killed Irish-American Sheriff Walter “Monk” McGinnis (Brendan Gleeson) and says line one. Bill nonchalantly replies with line two. In the 2003 Academy Awards, “Gangs of New York” was nominated in ten categories but did not win any Oscars. It was nominated for Best Picture but lost to “Chicago” and Martin Scorsese was nominated for Best Director but lost to Roman Polanski (for “The Pianist”). Although the draft riots for the Union army in the U.S. Civil War depicted in the film really did happen, the real-life Bill “The Butcher” Poole (the Daniel Day-Lewis character is based on him) was actually killed several years before the riots took place.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“Men still do that, don’t they? I’m not out of date, am I? Picking flowers for a woman as a sign of appreciation.” “No, not at all, except those are poisonous.” [laughs] “I’m kidding!”

Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
Below are incomplete words. Replace the letters in each bracket so that you can complete the word on the left and begin the word on the right. Good luck.

Ri ( _ _ _ ) satile
Al ( _ _ _ ) oury
Mo ( _ _ _ ) ergo
Unaw ( _ _ _ ) na
A ( _ _ _ _ ) ounce
Fel ( _ _ _ ) ly

Answer: River – versatile
Alarm – armoury
Mound – undergo
Unaware – arena
Apron – pronounce
Fellow – lowly

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
A vacationing family sitting around the campfire has the following conversation:

  1. Father: What day is it? I am sure it isn’t Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday.
  2. Mother: Well that’s not very helpful dear. Besides yesterday was Friday.
  3. Father: No, now that I think about it, yesterday wasn’t Friday, tomorrow is Friday.
  4. Jon: The day after tomorrow is Thursday.
  5. Meg: You are nuts. Tomorrow is Thursday.
  6. Mother: Actually, it’s probably Thursday today.
  7. Jon: All we know for sure is that it wasn’t Sunday yesterday.

If only one statement above is true, what day of the week is it?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,


CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.



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