Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to WEDNESDAY May 5, 2021

Funny medical definitions:
Benign – what you be after you be eight.
Artery – the study of paintings.
Bacteria – back door to the cafeteria.
Barium – what doctors do when patients die.
Caesarean section – a neighborhood in Rome.
Cauterize – caught her eye.
Colic – a dog like Lassie.
Coma – a punctuation mark.
D&C – Where Washington is.
Dilate – living a long time.
Enema – not a friend.
Fester – quicker than someone else.
Fibula – a small lie.
Genital – non-Jewish person.
Hangnail – what you hang your coat on.
Impotent – distinguished and well known.
Labor pain – getting hurt at work.
Medical staff – a doctor’s cane.
Morbid – an offer higher than the one I bid.
Nitrates – cheaper than day rates.
Node – I knew it.
Outpatient – a patient who has fainted.
Pap smear – a fatherhood test.
Post operative – the mailman.
Rectum – darn near killed him.
Secretion – hiding something.
Tablet – a small table.
Tumor – more than one.
Urine – opposite of you’re out.
Varicose – nearby.
That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a WONDEFUL WEDNESDAY! people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.” – Al McGuire

“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.” – Alan Dundes

“Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.” – Albert Camus

“Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the
hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.” – Albert Einstein

“The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.” – Albert Einstein

“All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.” – Alexander Woollcott

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing
and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
“I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?”
The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There’s a silence, then a shot.
Back on the phone, the guy says, “Okay, now what?” 😳😁😎

Tuesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“We’re the first team.”
“Yeah, and we’re not gonna fall for a banana in the tailpipe.”

Answer: Beverly Hills Cop!
In the events leading up to this scene, a friend visiting from California is killed right before the eyes of Detroit cop Detective Axel Foley (Eddie Murphy). Foley follows the killer to Beverly Hills, California, where Lieutenant Andrew Bogomil (Ronny Cox) in the Beverly Hills police department assigns Detective Billy Rosewood (Judge Reinhold) and Rosewood’s partner, Sergeant John Taggart (John Ashton), to keep an eye on him. In order to slip away from them to do some investigating of the murder of his friend, he manages to slip a banana into the tailpipe of their car while they are parked. When he takes off by car and they try to follow, the banana makes their car stall. In this scene, Rosewood and Taggart have been replaced by the “A” team. Detective McCabe (Joel Bailey) says the first line to Foley and his partner Detective Foster (Art Kimbro) adds line two. In the 1985 Academy Awards, “Beverly Hills Cop” was nominated for an Oscar in the category of Screenplay Written Directly for the Screen but lost to “Places in the Heart.” Many of the comic lines in this movie were improvised and hundreds of takes were ruined by actors or the director himself who laughed during filming.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“Tell me I’m a good man.”
“You ARE.”

Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
Each group of three definitions describes three words that are spelled the same, except for one letter
(each group describes a different set of words). Example: king, ring, wing.

1a) inexperienced
1b) to address with expressions of kind wishes
1c) unreasonable selfish desire

2a) highly skilled
2b) to conform
2c) to accept formally and put into effect

3a) a committee for judging and awarding prizes
3b) conceal or hide
3c) violent anger

4a) a rounded shape
4b) spoken
4c) a gemstone

Answer: 1) green, greet, greed
2) adept, adapt, adopt
3) jury, bury, fury
4) oval, oral, opal

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
Three girls (Jada, Sally, and Patty) and two boys (Huey and Timmy) decided to go out to the gardens and pick some flowers for their parents (Rebecca, Lindsey, Ken, Daniel, and Mike). Each child chose a different flower, and picked a different amount. Can you figure out their first and last names, their parent’s name, the flower they picked, and the amount they picked?

  1. The girls picked flowers for their dads, while the boys picked flowers for their moms.
  2. Ken Rosenthal received 2 flowers.
  3. Six daffodils were picked by Harrison.
  4. Sally and Daniel’s daughter are best friends.
  5. Only one person picked a flower with the same initial as their first name. Only one person received a flower with the same initial as their first name. Nobody picked or received a flower with the same initial as their last name.
  6. The 5 types of flowers are the sunflower, the type picked by Jada, the ones picked by Timmy, the ones given to Mike, and Sally’s flowers.
  7. Three daisies were picked by Gonzalez.
  8. Rebecca Jones received 5 sunflowers.
  9. Patty loves daffodils, so she picked some for her dad.

Good Luck!

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.,

CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s