Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to THURSDAY May 20, 2021

Here’s the story….
A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you pass the milk cases, you hear cows mooing, and you experience the scent of fresh mown hay.
In the meat department, there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The bread department features the tantalising smell of fresh baked bread & cookies. I don’t buy toilet paper there anymore.😳

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY! people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“In Mexico, the world’s heaviest man, who weighs almost 1,000 pounds,
is preparing for surgery. The man said, ‘After years of being unhappy with
my appearance, I’m finally getting that nose job.'” -Conan O’Brien

“A town in Texas just announced a controversial plan to recycle toilet water
and use it for drinking water. Dogs said, ‘How are you only thinking of this now?'” -Jimmy Fallon

“New research suggests that people who are more ambitious will live longer.
While people who are less ambitious will live longer with their parents.” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice
and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, “If you are in a vacuum
and someone calls your name, can you hear it?”
She thought for a time and then asked, “Is the vacuum on or off?” 😳

Wednesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Kids are scared of the dark.”
“You’re afraid of the dark, too, Marv.”

Answer: Home Alone!
In the events leading up to this scene, the large family of Kevin McAllister (Macaulay Culkin) accidentally leaves him behind when it rushes to the airport to go to France for their Christmas vacation (just prior to the family leaving, Kevin had been sent to the attic for misbehaving). Kevin prepares to spend Christmas alone, but becomes aware of two house burglars (played by Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern) casing his neighborhood. In this scene, the burglars plan to burglarize Kevin’s house after dark, after they become aware he is home alone. Marv (Daniel Stern) is pleased by this plan and says line one. His partner Harry (Joe Pesci) responds with line two. In the 1991 Academy Awards “Home Alone” was nominated for two Oscars but didn’t win either. The posters and DVD cases for this movie (showing a wide-eyed Culkin with both hands on his face) is often compared to the famous painting “The Scream” by Edvard Munch.

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“Pardon me, sir, but I lost my ID in… in a flood and I’d like to get some Old Harper, hard stuff. Would you mind buying a bottle for me?”
“Why certainly. I lost my wife, too – her name wasn’t Idy, though, and it wasn’t in a flood – but I know what ya… “

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
Find the synonymous word for each word in the following pair. For each pair, the words you find should rhyme with each other, the first word being an adjective and the second a noun. Some of these are easy, others are more challenging. Good luck!

For example: angry father= mad dad

Depressed circus entertainer

Not living center of a pencil

Cool film

Not soft protector

Answer: Depressed circus entertainer =Down Clown

Not living center of a pencil = Dead Lead

Cool film= Groovy Movie

Not soft protector= Hard Guard

Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
Four Tae Kwon Do students, each with a different belt rank and a different instructor, won medals in four different events at a recent tournament. Using the clues below, can you figure out the correct instructor, belt rank and event for each student?

Students: John, David, Janet, Katie
Instructors: Master Smith, Mr. Brown, Ms. Campbell, Mr. Long
Student ranks: Black belt, blue belt, yellow belt, white belt
Events: Patterns, Sparring, Breaking, Hosin-Sul

Clues:

David’s instructor is not female.
Neither John nor Katie is a black belt.
The white belt won her Breaking division.
Mr. Brown’s student is a black belt.
The Master instructor teaches the blue belt.
Ms. Campbell’s student won Sparring.
Janet has never competed in Hosin-Sul.
Either David or John won the Sparring division.
The yellow belt’s name begins with J.
Janet is a student of Mr. Brown.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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