Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to FRIDAY JULY 2, 2021

Here’s the Story….
The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a Methamphetamine lab had been found in
an old farmhouse in the adjoining county and he asked me a rhetorical question:

“Why didn’t we have a drug problem when you and I were growing up?”

I replied I DID have a drug problem when I was young:

I was drug to church for weddings and funerals.

I was drug to family reunions and community socials no matter the weather.

I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults. I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie,
brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the teacher or the preacher, or if I didn’t put forth my best
effort in everything that was asked of me.

I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if I uttered a profanity.I was drug out to pull weeds in
mom’s garden and flowerbeds and cockleburs out of dad’s fields.

I was drug to the homes of family, friends and neighbors to help out some poor soul who had no one to mow the yard, repair
the clothesline, or chop some firewood; and, if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as a tip for this kindness,
she would have drug me back to the woodshed.

Those drugs are still in my veins and they affect my behavior in everything I do, say, or think. They are stronger than cocaine,
crack, or heroin; and, if today’s children had this kind of drug problem, America would be a better place.

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a GREAT JULY 4TH WEEKEND! people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

A father is one whose daughter marries a man who is vastly her inferior,
but then gives birth to unbelievably brilliant grandchildren. ~ Anonymous

Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over
a million-dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla. ~ Jim Bishop

A father carries pictures where his
money used to be. ~ Anonymous

For Father’s Day we got my dad a t-shirt that says: “Do not resuscitate.” He
wears it whenever my mom takes him to the ballet. ~ Greg Tamblyn

Fatherhood is pretending the present you
ove most is soap-on-a-rope. ~ Bill Cosby

On Father’s Day, I’m doing something for my dad that he’s wanted
for years. I’m getting a job. ~ Melanie White

Remember: What Dad really wants
is a nap. Really. ~ Dave Barry

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play.

“Here’s a copy of the service,” he said impatiently. “But, you’ll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances.”

During the service, the minister paused and said, “Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up.”

At that moment, the substitute organist played “The Star Spangled Banner.”

And that is how the substitute became the regular organist! 😁

Thursdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Toto, I’ve a feeling we’re not in Kansas any more.”

Answer: “The Wizard of Oz”.
Simply put, “The Wizard of Oz” is considered to be one of the most beloved and popular films in history, and quite possibly the most watched, especially after it began to air yearly on television after 1959. Directed by Victor Fleming and released in 1939, the film also starred Ray Bolger (Scarecrow), Jack Haley (Tin Man), Bert Lahr (Cowardly Lion), Margaret Hamilton (Wicked Witch of the West), and Frank Morgan as the Wizard. Nominated for six Oscars, the film won for Best Original Song and Original Score. “Over The Rainbow” was ranked as the number one movie song of all time by the American Film Institute in 2004. Other AFI rankings include number six (out of 100) for best film (1998), #3 for musicals (2006), #1 (out of ten) fantasy film (2008), and #4 villain (Wicked Witch of the West, 2003).

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“He chose..poorly.”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
In your future and in your past
I come and go so senseless and fast
My purpose is unknown to all
Remembrance seems to drift then fall
I travel by night and fade by day
Because that is my common way

Answer: Dreams

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
Each of the following sentences has three missing words. The first missing word of each sentence is 6 letters long, the second missing word is 5 letters long, and the third missing word is 4 letters long. All the 6 letter words are anagrams of each other, as are all the 5 letter words, and all the 4 letter words. Can you fill in the blanks?

1) Nobody would _ to the old pirate any more, because his were far too __.

2) The fans were _ as the opposition managed to the game from the home __.

3) When he decided to , he did not expect bread with his ___ every meal.

4) On many of the lake’s _ in the Spring, will be out looking for a __.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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