Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to THURSDAY JULY 8, 2021

Here’s The Story…
An atheist was walking through the woods.
“What majestic trees!”
“What powerful rivers!”
“What beautiful animals!”
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant the Atheist cried out, “Oh my God!”
Time Stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. “You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don’t exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.” “Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?”
The atheist looked directly into the light, “It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?”
“Very Well,” said the voice.
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke:
“Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.”

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY! people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A woman in South Carolina just gave birth to a 14.4-pound baby boy.
The doctor said, ‘Congratulations! It’s a man!'” -Jimmy Fallon

“I think all these storms are God’s way of sending us a message. I think that message
is that when warm humid air masses surge northward from the Gulf of Mexico and combine
with a strong jet stream, it can result in severe weather conditions.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“According to new research, a press-on patch for the flu vaccine works just as well as the
flu shot. You just remove the adhesive backing and place it firmly over your co-worker’s mouth.” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and after a big fight they were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, ‘Important; wake me at 5:00 AM.’
He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 8:00 AM and he had
missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn’t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, ‘It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.’ Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests. 😳😁😎

Wednesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“I have, and if you had the sense of a billy goat, you’d clean your house up ‘stead of bummin’ ’round ours.”

Answer: The Outsiders!
Ponyboy Curtis tells this to his buddy Keith ‘Two-Bit’ Mathews in reply to Two-Bit’s previous statement, “Shoot, this house ain’t dirty. You ought to see my house.” The Greasers (the tough poor kids) and the Socs (the angry rich kids) are from two different sides of town. Ponyboy (Howell) and Johnny Cade (Macchio) are in the wrong place at the wrong time, when a group of Socs spot them alone in the park. Johnny kills Bob (the leader) in self defense, but the boys are afraid of going to jail and getting split up. With help from their friend Dally, (Dillon) the boys hide out in an abandoned church. When the church catches on fire and small children are inside, the two boys show us what being true heros means.
“The Outsiders” was released in 1983, and starred Tom Cruise, Rob Lowe, Patrick Swayze, Matt Dillon, Ralph Macchio, C. Thomas Howell and Emilio Estevez. It was directed by Francis Ford Coppola. This movie was based on a novel of the same title written by S.E. Hinton when she was only 16 years old.

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
Mr. Ryan: “It seems to me the only thing you’ve learned is that Caesar is ‘a salad dressing dude’.”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
I am tied up at least once a day
And forced to carry ten nails.
I work diligently without any pay
And follow your many trails.

I do not smell very well
But at least I have many eyes.
I have two tongues but never yell
And I’ll bet you know my size.

What am I?

Answer: Your shoes!

Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
“She” is a word that contains two personal pronouns: she and he. What five-letter word beginning with “U” contains four personal pronouns?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.
​​​

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s