WELCOME to WEDNESDAY JULY 28, 2021
On the subject of Colonoscopies. . . Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were
quite humorous. . . . . A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients
(predominately male), while he was performing their colonoscopies:
'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!' 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?' 'Can you hear me NOW?' 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?' 'You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married. ' 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?' 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out. . . ' 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!' 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!' 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity. ' 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?' And the best one of all: 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'
That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY! people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“To succeed in life, you need three things: a
wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone. “ – Reba McEntire
“Somedays you eat salad and work out. Somedays
you have cupcakes and pizza. It’s called balance.
“Bad days aren’t always bad. At least
you’ll find out who your true friends are. “
“Life is like a roller coaster pic – scary at
the moment, funny looking back.”
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse
and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious,
her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room,
putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old
say with a trembling voice, “Who was THAT?”😳😁😎
Tuesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Hey! I’m gliding here!”
Answer: Miss Congeniality!
Sandra Bullock is FBI agent Grace Hart who is selected to go undercover as a contestant in the Miss United States beauty pageant. In order to catch a serial bomber known as The Citizen, she must make the final five in the contest to gain access to the restricted backstage areas.
Grace, however, does not live up to her name and lacks the polish needed to pull off such a stunt. Enter Victor Melling (Michael Caine), a pageant consultant who is called on to train her in all areas of deportment and grooming before the contest.
This quote is from the scene where Victor is trying (and failing spectacularly) to teach her to walk gracefully, when she is almost run over by a taxi.
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“There is a smell in here that is gonna outlast religion”
Tuesday’s Quizzler is….
If you have played Might and Magic (a computer game), then you have encountered the Vowel-less Knights,
a strange group who speak without vowels. It is up to you to decipher what they are saying. In their tradition then, what are the following sayings?
1) shll rtrn.
2) Th sht hrd rnd th wrld.
3) Cm p nd s m smtm.
Answer: 1) I shall return.
Bonus: General MacArthur, when he left the Philippines. Side note: He did.
2) The shot heard around the world.
Bonus: This phrase was used by the press of the day to describe the first time American soldiers fought the British, as the British troops marched through Lexington on their way to Concord, and history.
3) Come up and see me sometime.
Bonus: Mae West, arguably the most popular USO entertainer and pinup girl of WW2.
Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
Insert a word from group B into a word from group A to form a larger word. (Try & Eat = Treaty)
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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