Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to FRIDAY JULY 30, 2021

Why Men Don’t Write Advice Columns…..

Dear Walter,

I hope you can help me here. The other day, I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn’t driven more than a mile down the road when the engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband’s help.

When I got home, I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was on our living room couch, kissing the neighbor girl. I am 32, my husband is 34, and the neighbor girl is 22. We have been married for ten years.

When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that they had been having an affair for the past six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum, he has become increasingly distant. He won’t go to counseling and I’m afraid I can’t get through to him anymore.

Can you please help? Sincerely, Sheila


Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the vacuum pipes and hoses on the intake manifold and also check all grounding wires. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.

I hope this helps. Walter

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND! people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

Life is a mountain. Your goal is to find
your path, not to reach the top. Maxime Lagacé

If you spend too much time thinking about a
thing, you’ll never get it done. Bruce Lee

Life can only be understood backwards;
but it must be lived forwards. Søren Kierkegaard

Believe you can and you’re
halfway there. Theodore Roosevelt

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
An old Italian man lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was very hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Papa
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Papa, Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.
Love, Vinnie
At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Papa, Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you, Vinnie 😁😎

Thursdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“By Grabthar’s hammer, by the sons of Warvan, you shall be avenged”

Answer: Galaxy Quest!
“Galaxy Quest” is a movie about a long defunct, fictional television series of the same name. The stars of the show are unable to move on with their lives, and tour the country, appearing at store openings and Galaxy Quest conventions. Dr Lazarus, played by Alexander Dane (Alan Rickman) is tired of repeating his immortal line every time and threatens to quit the group. The unthinkable happens when a group of Thermians come to Earth to request the help of the intrepid Galaxy Quest crew. Trouble is, the crew think the Thermians are fans and the Thermians believe “Galaxy Quest” is a series of factual historical documents. When the team is caught up in this real life space mission, to save the Thermians from the evil Sarris, Alexander Dane becomes close to Quellek, a young Thermian who holds him in high esteem. After Quellek is shot by one of Sarris’ henchmen and lays dying, Alexander not only quotes this line to him, he actually carries out the promise.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“It’s a stampede!”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
Below are incomplete words. Place two letters in each bracket so that you can complete the word on the left and begin the word on the right. Good luck.

Perfu (–) rge
Barb (–) itor
Again (–) ain
Sta (–) sture
Giraf (–) deral
Featu (–) medy

Answer: Perfume – merge
Barbed – editor
Against – stain
Stage – gesture
Giraffe – federal
Feature – remedy

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
Can you decipher this phrase:

friends
standing
miss
friends

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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