WELCOME to THURSDAY AUGUST 19, 2021
Here’s The Story…..
An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly; the Loch Ness Monster attacked his boat. In one easy flip, the beast tossed him and his boat at least a hundred feet into the air. It then opened its mouth waiting below to swallow them both. As the man sailed head over heels and started to fall towards the open jaws of the ferocious beast he cried out, “OH, my God! Help me!”
Suddenly, the scene froze in place and as the atheist hung in midair a booming voice came out of the clouds and said, “I thought you didn’t believe in me!”
“God, come on, give me a break!” the man pleaded,” Just seconds ago I didn’t believe in the Loch Ness Monster either!” “Well,” said God, “now that you are a believer, you must understand that I won’t work miracles to snatch you from certain death in the jaws of the monster, but I can change hearts. What would you have me do?”
The atheist thinks for a minute then says, “God, please have the Loch Ness Monster believe in you also.”
God replies, “So be it.”
The scene starts in motion again with the atheist falling towards the ravenous jaws of the monster. The Loch Ness Monster folds his claws together and says, “Lord, bless this food you have so graciously provided…”
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY!
people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“A resort in Mexico has opened the first underwater bar. Shortly afterwards it
became host to the world’s slowest bar fight ever.” -Conan O’Brien 😁
“Taco Bell announced it will begin selling a potato-rito, which is beef, cheese, potatoes,
and chipotle spice wrapped in a tortilla for $1. Or, for the same nutritional value,
just eat the dollar.” -Seth Meyers
“Vin Diesel is with us tonight. Vin is not his real name. His real
name is Vehicle Identification Number.” -Jimmy Kimmel
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A Missouri farmer passed away and left 17 mules to his three sons. The instructions left in the will said
that the oldest boy was to get one-half, the second oldest one-third, and the youngest one-ninth. The
three sons, recognizing the difficulty of dividing 17 mules into these fractions, began to argue.
Their uncle heard about the argument, hitched up his mule and drove out to settle the matter. He added
his mule to the 17, making 18. The oldest therefore got one-half, or nine, the second oldest got one-third,
or six, and the youngest son got one-ninth, or two. Adding up 9, 6 and 2 equals 17. The uncle, having
settled the argument, hitched up his mule and drove home. 😳
Wednesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Hey, Jay. Zed called. The high consulate from Solaxiant 9 wants floor seats for the next Bulls game.”
“All right, let’s put in a call to Dennis Rodman. He’s from that planet.”
Answer: Men In Black!
This entertaining movie follows the activities of a top-secret organization under Chief Zed (Rip Torn) that monitors and polices alien activity on earth. New recruit Agent J (Will Smith) and Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) often use tabloid stories like “An Alien Stole My Husband’s Skin” to keep abreast of new developments they should investigate. In this scene (the last scene in the movie) newest recruit Agent L (Linda Fiorentino) says the first line to Jay (Agent J) and he responds with line two. In the 1998 Academy Awards, “Men in Black” won one Oscar and was nominated for two others. The impressive special effects were another successful creation of George Lucas’ company Industrial Light and Magic (ILM).
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“I’ll get you my pretty and your little dog too!”
“It’s all right. You can get up. She’s gone.”
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
023456789 lives ever ever ever ever
Answer: No one lives forever. 😁
Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
What phrase is described by the following rebus?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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