Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to THURSDAY OCTOBER 28, 2021

Objects of humor….

I knew a woman who owned a taser. Man, was she stunning!
I meant to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.
Did you hear about that great new shovel? It’s ground breaking.
This whiteboard is remarkable.
Inspecting mirrors is a job I could really see myself doing.
Two antennas got married last Saturday. The reception was fantastic.
Writing with a dull pencil is pointless.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
The golfer brought an extra pair of pants in case he got a hole in one.
Why does Peter Pan fly all the time? He Neverlands.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler.
I did a performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words.
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
What would you call a fish with a missing eye? A fsh, probably.
My dog can do magic tricks. It’s a labracadabrador.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY people,
stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A dog in Seattle is making news after commuters noticed it had been riding the bus to a local park
all by itself. Everyone says the dog is amazing, while the dog said, panicking, ‘I gotta find that blind
guy. I’m in a lot of trouble if I don’t find him.” -Jimmy Fallon

“A study showed that every hour of TV you watch after the age of 25 shortens your life by 22 minutes.
That doesn’t sound too bad to me. You’d probably watch TV with that 22 minutes anyway.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“Police are looking for a woman who stole $3,000 worth of cat-grooming supplies at an airport
baggage carousel. Police describe the suspect as ‘single.'” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A college student could not take his seminar final exam because of a funeral.
“No problem,” the teacher told him. “Make it up the following week.” That week came, and again
he couldn’t take the test due to another funeral.
“You’ll have to take the test early next week,” the professor insisted. “I can’t keep postponing it.”
“I’ll take the test next week if no one dies,” the undergrad replied.
By now I the instructor was suspicious. “How can you have so many people you know pass away in three weeks?”
“I don’t know any of these people,” the student exclaimed. “But I’m the only gravedigger in town.” 😁😎

Wednesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“May I obey all of your commands with equal pleasure, sire.”

Answer: “The Adventures of Robin Hood”
In the 1938 film, Robin and his band of Merry Men rob from the rich and give to the poor. Robin still has time to court Maid Marian and keep Prince John off the throne. The line is spoken in a serious moment at the end of the movie. King Richard says to Robin Hood; “My first command to you, my lord Earl, is to take in marriage the hand of the Lady Marian. What say you to that, Baron of Locksley?”. Robin Hood then replies with the quoted line. Born in Tasmania, Australia, Flynn became an overnight sensation with his first role in “Captain Blood”. He was in several films including “The Dawn Patrol”, “Dodge City” and “Adventures of Don Juan”.

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Be happy in your work.”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
What common phrase is represented below?

IGAR
CIGR
CGAR
CIGA
CIAR

Answer: Close, but no cigar.

Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
The following clues refer to the names of several young women, in the form of Miss Suchandsuch.
These names then actually form a new word (although there will be a spelling difference with one s missing)
For example, “This young woman obeys all the rules” would be misbehave (Miss Behave)

Can you figure out the rest of the words?

This young woman is in great shape.
This young woman is very generous at Christmas.
This young woman showed me where to go.
You could tell this young woman all your secrets.
This young woman knew exactly what I meant.
This young woman is exactly the right choice.
This young woman could lead the orchestra.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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