Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Here’s The Story….
A rabbi and a priest get into a car accident and it’s a bad one. Both cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of the cleric is hurt. After they crawl out of the remains of their cars, the rabbi sees the priest’s collar and says, “So you’re a priest. And I’m a rabbi. Just look at our cars. There’s nothing left, but we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God. God must have meant that we should meet and become friends and live together in peace the rest of our days.”

The priest replies, “I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God.”

The rabbi continues, “And look at this. Here’s another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of schnapps didn’t break. Surely God wants us to drink this and celebrate our good fortune.”

He offers the bottle to the priest who willingly takes a few big swigs, and hands the bottle back to the rabbi. The rabbi takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap on, and hands it back to the priest.

The priest asks, ” Aren’t you having any?”

The rabbi replies, “No thanks. I think I’ll wait for the police.” 😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND people,
stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal,
not to people or things.”– Albert Einstein

“Never let the fear of striking out keep you
from playing the game.”– Babe Ruth

“Money and success don’t change people; they merely
amplify what is already there.” — Will Smith

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.
Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of
other people’s thinking.” – Steve Jobs

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play.
“Here’s a copy of the service,” he said impatiently. “But you’ll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances.”
During the service, the minister paused and said, “Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up.”
At that moment, the substitute organist played “The Star-Spangled Banner.”
And that is how the substitute became the regular organist! 😳

Thursdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Now you’ve done it.”

Answer: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets!
Harry says this to his owl, Hedwig, in “Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets”. He says this because Hedwig keeps annoying uncle Vernon and so Vernon yells at Harry. That movie is about Harry returning to his second year at Hogwarts where dangerous things begin happening to many people. They also find out that history is repeating itself because the Chamber of Secrets is opened again.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Just so we’re clear, I’d like a more corporate bling.”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
This teaser is based on ‘funny’ alternative definitions a word could have if you broke the word up into its syllables and treated the syllables as words in themselves. I will provide a list of words or names and a list of definitions; it is your job to match them up.

They are meant to be a bit light hearted and may not have perfect pronunciation so work the words in your head a bit. Having the definitions should provide help in this regard. Also note that sometimes the ‘new word’ syllables may not only be using one syllable in the word.

An example would be:
Word: Contemplate “Con template”: A stencil that criminals are made from.


What a guy in a boat does
A vehicle’s under arm
Untruth’s that are.. errr.. sensible
Politically correct term for a hole in a shoe
Where some hemlines fall

Answer: Baloney – ‘buh-lo-knee’: Where some hemlines fall
Heroes – ‘hee-rows’: What a guy in a boat does
Carpet – ‘car pit’: A vehicle’s under arm
Rationalise – ‘ra-shin-al-lies’: Untruth’s that are.. errr.. sensible
Solvent – ‘sole-vent’: Politically correct term for a hole in a shoe

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
In this teaser, you are to start with the letter ‘U’, and then each time add a letter and shuffle
it to make a new word. You need to continue this process until you reach the word ‘PRODUCE’.

Not including ‘U’, you must do this in six (6) turns.

Good luck.

_ _


LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,


CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.
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