Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to MONDAY MARCH 21, 2022

Here’s The Story…
Eddie went out to buy a paper, and he was only gone for about three minutes. When he came out of the shop, there was a traffic warden writing out a parking ticket. The car was on a double yellow line.
Eddie approached the warden and said smiling, ‘Give me a break, I was only away a minute.’ The warden just carried on writing out the parking ticket and
completely ignored Eddie’s plea. Eddie, rather angry at being so openly ignored,
called the warden, ‘A goose-stepping Nazi.’
The warden glared at Eddie and started writing another parking ticket, this time for having a smooth tire. Eddie called him an even ruder name. The traffic warden finished the second
ticket and put it on the windscreen alongside the first. Then he started
writing a third ticket for a tiny hole in the windscreen! This went on for
about twenty minutes, and you can see the result in the picture to the right.
The more Eddie insulted him, the more tickets the traffic warden wrote out and
slapped on the windscreen. Eddie did not care one bit. Eddie thought it funny because his
car was safely parked on the top floor of the multi-story car park. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Amazon is testing a new service that allows couriers to unlock homes and leave packages
inside. Learn more about the new service on a future episode of ‘Dateline’.” -Seth Meyers

“It’s spring break! Just remember, the partying lasts a week,
but the photos will cost you jobs forever.” -Jimmy Fallon

“After residents in Birmingham complained about the terrible smell, New York City has agreed
to stop sending railcars full of the city’s excess sewage to a landfill in Alabama. Yeah, train cars
filled with human waste and an unbearable smell–or, as that’s called in New York, the subway.” -James Corden

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
“Did you give the prisoner the third degree?” the police sergeant asked the detective.
“Yeah, we browbeat him pretty good,” nodded the other. “Asked him every question we could think of.”
“And did you get a confession?” asked the sergeant.
“Not exactly,” explained the officer. “All he’d say was, ‘Yes dear,’ and doze off.” 😳

Fridays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“He doesn’t have a passport.”
“For the last six months, he’s gone to Harvard and Berkeley. I’m betting he can get a passport.”

Answer: Catch Me If You Can!
In this scene FBI agent Carl Hanratty (Tom Hanks) and his team of agents are hot on the trail of con man and master forger Frank Abagnale, Jr. (Leonardo DiCaprio) and have trailed him to the Miami International Airport. One of the FBI agents (Tom Fox), thinking that Frank might leave the country and escape their jurisdiction, says line one. Hanratty, however, realizes just how skilled Frank is, despite being a young man, and replies with line two. This movie is the true story of Frank Abagnale, Jr. who, before his 19th birthday, successfully impersonated an airline pilot, a doctor, and a lawyer and cashed more than $2.5 million in fraudulent checks in every U.S. state and 26 foreign countries.
In the 2003 Academy Awards actor Christopher Walken and music director John Williams were nominated for Oscars but neither won. Two of the personas that Frank takes on are comic book characters. The movie explains how he took the name Barry Allen, the alter ego of DC comic’s “The Flash,” when pretending to be a federal agent. In another episode (while pretending to be a doctor) he used the name Dr. Connors. The alter ego of Spider-Man enemy, “The Lizard,” is Dr. Curtis Connors (“Amazing Spider-Man” #6, November 1963).

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Leave it to me. In ten days I’ll have us at war with them and make it look like their fault!”
“George, you’re mad! You’re absolutely out of your mind!”

Friday’s Quizzler is….
Read the sentence below and determine what the four uppercase words have in common.

As you put down your bowl of STEW and take your SEAT, you let out a SHOUT and leap back up; you sat on a THORN!

ANSWER: They are anagrams of the four directions: WEST, EAST, SOUTH, and NORTH.

Monday’s Quizzler is…….
Based on the clue in parentheses, find a four-letter word that can be inserted backwards into the blank to complete a longer word.

Example: di____ve (a defeat)
Answer: dissolve (“A defeat” gives you LOSS, which is placed backwards in the blank: di_SSOL_ve.)

s____ing (profound, extreme, or intense)
si____ll (inspired by a feeling of reverence)
re____ed (draw with force)
s____hot (to extend over)

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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