Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to MONDAY JUNE 7, 2022

Here’s The Story…
Cletus is passing by Billy Bob’s hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door,
he sees Billy Bob doing a striptease in front of an old John Deere tractor.
Butt clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off the right strap of his overalls,
followed by the left. He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move,
lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt.
Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath.
With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.
Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, “What the world’re ya doing, Billy Bob?”
“Good grief, Cletus, ya scared the bejeebers out of me,” says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob.
“But me ‘n the wife been havin’ trouble lately in the bedroom d’partment, and
the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor.”
That’s my Story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY! people,
stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“According to a new survey that just came out, the issue most on the minds of
college students is whether they’ll be able to find a job when they graduate.
Experts say it’s silly for college students to worry about whether or not they’ll
be able to find a job because the answer is no.” -Conan O’Brien

“A new restaurant has opened in Boston where all the food is cooked by robots.
It’s a little different than having a human cooking staff. Instead of finding a
hair in your food, you’ll find a USB cable.” -James Corden

“Beachgoers in Florida have been warned about deadly flesh-eating bacteria
in the water. Of course, if you’re even in Florida, you’ve already
ignored a few warnings.” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
One evening after dinner, a five-year-old son noticed that his mother
had gone out and he asked, “Where did mommy go?”
His father told him, “Mommy is at a Tupperware party.”
This explanation satisfied him for only a moment. “What’s a Tupperware party, Dad?”
The man had always given my son honest answers, so he figured a simple explanation
would be the best approach. “Well, son,” he said, “at a Tupperware party, a bunch of
ladies sit around and sell plastic bowls to each other.”
He nodded, indicating that he understood this curious pastime.
Then he burst into laughter. “Come on, Dad,” he said. “What is it really?”😳

Mondays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“As you know, our research here relates to the biochemical mechanisms of disease. And I am pleased to announce this morning that God has agreed to provide us with all the answers we need for just under $800,000.”

Answer: Creator!
The scene for this quote takes place as Wolper (O’Toole) requests grant funding for research that he is conducting at the University. Dr. Kullenbeck (David Ogden Stiers) becomes upset afterwards when he learns that the funding will follow Wolper, instead of coming to the University.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“There is a man in the toilet sellin’ after shave. Now, what’s that all about?”

Monday’s Quizzler is….
Who can’t live without Spell Check in their email or word software? It’s a great tool…
Unless you are poor Paula Abdul who transforms into “Pail Abut” when the Spell Checker has at her.
The following Music Stars have been Spell Checked and are ready for you to uncover their true identities.

Keen Chimney
Bayonet Knowledge
Retching Wilson
Jousting Tumblers
Went Steamy
Madden
Tubby Kith
Pariah Curry
Rebel Mentioned
Cozy About Answer: 1. Kenny Chesney
Beyonce Knowles
Gretchen Wilson
Justin Timberlake
Gwen Stefani
Madonna
Toby Keith
Mariah Carey
Reba McEntire
Ozzy Osbourne

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….
Below are two clues for words that are homophones of each other. For example, “Number
after one…Also” would result in “Two…Too”. Can you get all of the words?

Tiny Spider…Not sure if I will or not
Made the gun more accurate…Quoted
Container…Light
Head organ…Yes

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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