WELCOME to THURSDAY JUNE 16, 2022
Think you’ve herd them all? Cows are pretty funny and it would be a total shame if we didn’t
milk them for all they’re worth. There are just too many play-on-words not to have a bunch of
cow puns at your disposal at the next event—hopefully on a farm. At the least, you’ll have a
new-found appreciation for these incredible animals.
- Watch out, you don’t want to butcher any of these jokes.
- The steaks are high.
- I have some real beef with that guy.
- I got the mooves like Jagger.
- Make sure you show up on time, otherwise Bessie will have a cow.
- Milk it for all it’s worth.
- I am not amoosed.
- And then I told my therapist that I feel seen, but not herd…
- I am udderly in love with you!
- Not as mooch as I love you.
- I always found cowculus to be the most interesting subject.
- The cow was so excited for the day ahead that he was over the moon.
- An udder day, an udder dollar.
- Seize the moo-ment!
- Holy cow!
- Steer clear! Cows coming through!
- Move! Get out of the hay!
- If you feel like you’ve herd all these cow puns before, you probably have deja-moo.
- Cow bells make such beautiful moosic.
- A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
That’s my Story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY! people,
stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Microsoft is working on technology that removes the need for cashiers
and checkout lines. This cutting-edge technology is
known as ‘shoplifting.'” -Conan O’Brien
“Nordstrom is launching a new home and wellness collection that features
a marijuana-scented candle. You can use it to cover up the smell
when you get stoned on vanilla.” -Seth Meyers
“This Sunday is Father’s Day. With the big day coming up, a lot of people
are shopping for the perfect Father’s Day card, and while there are lots of
good choices, there are also some very unpopular cards out there. For example,
this card says, ‘Dad, you taught me everything I know.’ Open up, it says,
‘That’s why I’m so messed up.'” -Jimmy Fallon
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Eric is sitting at the bar staring morosely into his beer. Tom walks in and sits down.
After trying to start a conversation several times and getting only distracted grunts he asks Eric what the problem is. “Well,” said Eric, “I ran afoul of one of those trick questions women ask. Now I’m in deep trouble at home.” “What kind of question?” asked Tom.
“My wife asked me if I would still love her if when she was old, fat and ugly.”
“That’s easy,” said Tom. “You just say ‘Of course I will'”.
“Yeah,” said Eric, “That’s what I did, except I said, ‘Of course I DO…!'” 😳
Wednesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Whoever you were in those movies, those silly heroes meant a lot to me! What does it matter if it was an illusion? It worked! So don’t tell me this is you life-size. I can’t use you life-size. I need Alan Swanns as big as I can get them! And let me tell you something: you couldn’t have convinced me the way you did unless somewhere in you you had that courage! Nobody’s that good an actor! You are that silly hero!”
Answer: My Favorite Year!
The scene for this quote takes place as Stone (Linn-Baker) tries to convince Alan Swann (Peter O’Toole) that he should not have stage fright of performing in front of a live audience. This scene reflects the admiration that Stone (Linn-Baker) has had for Swann (O’Toole) his entire life. Stone (Linn-Baker) was primarily the reason Swann (O’Toole) had been booked onto the King Kaiser (Joseph Bologna) television show.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Wine is sunlight, held together by water.” The poetic wisdom of the Italian physicist, philosopher, and stargazer, Galileo Galilei. It all begins with the soil, the vine, the grape. The smell of the vineyard – like inhaling birth. And it wakens some ancestral sun. Primordial. Anyway, some deeply imprinted, probably subconscious place.”
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
What does the following rebus represent?
“Hurry, let me in,” said the Jester.
“No, me first!” said the Joker.
“Perhaps we should be careful about walking there,” said Gabriel.
“A wiser course may be to avoid stepping on the area,” said Uziel.
Answer: Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.
The joker and jester are other words for the court “fool”, and Gabriel and Uziel are two well known angels.
Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
We are often dangerous
But to some we are fun
To others we are frightening
Causing them to run
We come together
Though we seem apart
You see me and you hear my brother
Who oft times makes little ones run to their mothers,
I am bright and my brother is loud
And it may seem that we come from a cloud, What are we?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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