WELCOME to THURSDAY AUGUST 4, 2022
Here’s The Story…
Jack strode into ‘John’s Stable’ looking to buy a horse. “Listen here” said John, “I’ve got just
the horse your looking for, the only thing is, he was trained by an interesting fellow. He doesn’t
go and stop the usual way. The way to get him to stop is to scream heyhey the way to get him
to go is to scream Thank God. Jim nodded his head, “fine with me, can I take him for a test run?”
Jim was having the time of his life this horse sure could run he thought to himself. Jim was speeding
down the dirt road when he suddenly saw a cliff up ahead “stop!” screamed Jim, but the horse kept
on going. No matter how much he tried he could not remember the words to get it to stop. “yoyo”
screamed Jim but the horse just kept on speeding ahead. It was 5 feet from the cliff when Jim suddenly
remembered “heyhey!” Jim screamed. The horse skidded to a halt just 1 inch from the cliff. Jim could not
believe his good fortune, he looked up to the sky, raised his hands in the air, breathed a deep sigh of relief
and said with conviction “Thank God.” 😳 That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY
people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Is everyone here familiar with Crocs? Well, there’s a brand-new style that have just
been introduced; high-heel Crocs! High-heel Crocs – for the woman who wants to let
everyone know that she’s the drunkest mom at the kid’s pool party.” -James Corden
“IKEA has announced plans to test out small-scale stores that could fit more easily
into city environments. Just as soon as builders can figure out the instructions.” -Seth Meyers
“Yelp is going to start showing what restaurants scored on their health inspections. If you
want to know how your favorite restaurant did, trust me, no you don’t.” -Jimmy Fallon
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Before going on vacation, I went to a tanning salon. I was under the lights a bit long and
the protective shades I wore left a big white circle around each eye. Gazing at myself in the
mirror the next day, I thought, “Man, I look like a clown.” I had almost convinced myself that
I was overreacting until I got in line at the grocery store. I felt a tug at my shirt and looked
down to see a toddler staring up at me. He asked, “Are you giving out balloons?”😳
Wednesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“What do I want to be when I grow up? Alive.”
When Jack’s teacher was asking the students what they wanted to be when they grew up, Jack couldn’t help but respond with this answer. Jack was aging four years for every one year of his life. He knew that when he graduated school at 18, that his body would be 72.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flashes”
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
The following word pairs are anagrams which can be combined to form the
name of an animal or insect. Try to figure it out.
Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
Now that Forrie Agincourt has turned 13, he’s at loggerheads with his parents on a weekly basis, but his relationship with Auntie Jenn is everything a mentally active new teen could want. Over Labour Day weekend, the two of them scoured the dictionary for another list of apparent antonyms with which he could confound his progenitors. Each pair of definitions below involves two words that are spelled the same … except that the first start with “pro” and the second starts with “con”. Although Forrie wasn’t as polite when he challenged his parents with this second list, they still gave it a try. Prospera got 4 words, and Connor got 3. How many can you get?
- a stately parade — a grant
- plentiful — befuddle
- faculty member — clerical role
- an incitement — a gathering
- earliest form — 1,000 escudos
- formal catalogue — summary
- turn a hand palm down — analogous
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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