Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to THURSDAY AUGUST 11, 2022

“YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY…”

“Everything Comes In Threes” – Not true. In reality, everything comes in ones. Sometimes,
when three “ones” come in a row, it seems like everything comes in threes. By the way, in
medieval times, it was widely believed that everything came in twenty-sixes. They were wrong,
too. It just took them longer to recognize the pattern.

“You Can’t Take It With You (when you die)” – Well…, that depends on what it is. If it’s your dark
blue suit, you can certainly take it with you. In fact, not only can you take it with you, you can
probably put some things in your pockets.

“You Learn Something New Every Day” – Actually, you learn something old every day. Just because
you’ve just learned it, doesn’t mean it’s new. Other people already knew it, Columbus is a good example of this.

“You Get What You Pay For” – Clearly this is not true. Have you been shopping recently? Only a
very naive person would believe that you get what you pay for. In point of fact, if you check your
purchases carefully, you’ll find that you get whatever they feel like giving you. And if corporations
get any more powerful, you soon might not even get that.

“NICE GUYS FINISH LAST” – Not true. Studies have shown that, on average, nice guys finish third
in a field of six. Actually, short guys finish last. By the way, in medieval times, it was widely believed
that nice guys finished twenty-sixth. You can see how limited those people were.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY!
people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A new survey found that 46 percent of doctors have used Google or Yahoo to
diagnose their patients’ symptoms. Yeah, last time I got sick, my doctor was like,
‘I’m sorry to tell you this, but you have ‘Server Not Responding.'” -Jimmy Fallon

“Two women from Minnesota are seeking to file discrimination charges after the
police were called on them for breastfeeding at a public pool. Even worse, their
kids were charged with illegally bringing in an outside beverage.” -Seth Meyers😳

“The company that makes Ritz crackers has recalled 16 products, including Ritz
cheese cracker sandwiches, over concerns of salmonella. There’s definitely a moment
when you’re feeling sick and you’re wondering, ‘Is this because I consumed salmonella
or because I consumed an entire box of Ritz cheese cracker sandwiches?'” -James Corden

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Two lawyers are in a bank, when, suddenly, armed robbers burst in.
While one of the robbers takes the money from the tellers, the other lines the customers,
including the lawyers, up against a wall, and proceeds to take their wallets, watches, etc.
While this is going on lawyer number one jams something in lawyer number two’s hand.
Without looking down, lawyer number two whispers, “What is this?”
To which the first lawyer replies, “It’s that $50 I owe you.” 😳

Wednesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Rule Number Three: I can’t bring people back from the dead. It’s not a pretty picture, and I don’t like doing it.”

Answer: Aladdin!
Robin Williams played the Blue Genie in the first and third “Aladdin” movies. After Ali found the lamp, the Genie popped out and gave him the “rules regarding his three wishes…” Ali only needed two wishes and freed the Genie with his last wish. What a guy!

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“He really did lose his marbles, didn’t he?”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
he
now re

Answer: He came out of nowhere

Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
I’m never there when you need me,
For me you’ll have to wait,

I’ll provide a wealth of knowledge,
But always just too late,

What am I?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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