WELCOME to WEDNESDAY AUGUST 17, 2022
Here’s The Story…..
C, E-flat and G go into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve minors,” and E-flat leaves.
C and G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished and G is out flat.
F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough. D comes into the bar and
heads straight for the bathroom saying, “Excuse me, I’ll just be a second.”
A comes into the bar, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor and sends him out. Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and shouts, “Get out now. You’re the seventh minor I’ve found in this bar tonight.”
Next night, E-flat, not easily deflated, comes into the bar in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes.
The bartender says: “You’re looking pretty sharp tonight. Come on in. This could be a major development.” Sure enough, E-flat takes off his suit and everything else and stands there au naturel.
Eventually, C, who had passed out under the bar the night before, begins to sober up and realizes in horror that he’s under a rest. So, C goes to trial, is convicted of contributing to the diminution of a minor and sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an up scale correctional facility. The conviction is overturned on appeal, however, and C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless.
The bartender decides, however, that since he’s only had tenor so patrons, the soprano out in the bathroom, and everything has become alto much treble, he needs a rest and closes the bar. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY! people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“A new study finds that Americans have on average become several inches shorter
in the past 100 years. But scientists say it’s mainly because we’re all
looking down at our phones.” -Jimmy Fallon
“Auntie Anne’s has announced it will begin selling pumpkin spice pretzel nuggets next
month. So if you like pumpkin spice and you like eating at the mall… you could
probably use some good news.” -Seth Meyers
“I’ve been trying to say ‘I love you’ more often, starting this morning. I said it to my
family before I left the house. And then to my barista. And then to her manager, when
the barista complained that one of the customers was making her uncomfortable.” -Stephen Colbert
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
One day while jogging, a middle-aged man noticed a tennis ball lying by the side of the walk.
Being fairly new and in good condition, he picked the ball up, put it in his pocket and proceeded on his way. Waiting at the cross street for the light to change, he noticed a young woman standing next to him smiling. Noticing the rather distinct bulge she asked, “What do you have in your pocket?”
“Tennis ball,” the man said, smiling back. “Wow!” said the woman looking upset. “That must hurt. I once had tennis elbow and the pain was terrible!” 😳
Tuesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“O Captain, my Captain. Who knows where that comes from? Anybody? Not a clue? It’s from a poem by Walt Whitman about Mr. Abraham Lincoln. Now in this class you can either call me Mr. Keating, or if you’re slightly more daring, O Captain my Captain.”
Answer: “Dead Poets Society”!
Robin Williams played the role of John Keating in the movie “Dead Poets Society”. He was nominated, but failed to win the Oscar for his role also. Robin has come a long way since the days of “Mork and Mindy”. He was nominated for his first Oscar in “Good Morning, Vietnam” and finally picked up the golden guy for his supporting role in “Good Will Hunting”. Take what you can get, right Robin? If you didn’t notice, all the lines above are from Williams movies also.
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“I wanted it to be you. I wanted it to be you so badly.”
Tuesday’s Quizzler is….
I am one simple word, but I mean different things
One of my meanings brings great forceful swings,
The other of me, may have curve, like the first…
But only one meaning can help quench a thirst.
One of my meanings will often bring cheers,
Either of them could hold a few beers.
What word am I?
Answer: A pitcher
Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
Can you decipher this common phrase?
eyeeseeexcept
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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The World According to the Eucman! 