Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to FRIDAY NOVEMBER 18, 2022

Here’s the Story…..
Leola Starling of Ribrock, Tenn., had a serious telephone problem. But unlike most people she did something about it.
The brand-new $10 million Ribrock Plaza Motel opened nearby and had acquired almost the same telephone number as Leola.
From the moment the motel opened, Leola was besieged by calls not for her. Since she had the same phone number for years,
she felt that she had a case to persuade the motel management to change its number.
Naturally, the management refused claiming that it could not change its stationery.
The phone company was not helpful, either. A number was a number, and just because a customer was getting someone
else’s calls 24 hours a day didn’t make it responsible. After her pleas fell on deaf ears, Leola decided to take matters into her own hands.
At 9 o’clock the phone rang. Someone from Memphis was calling the motel and asked for a room for the following Tuesday. Leoloa said, “No problem. How many nights?” A few hours later Dallas checked in. A secretary wanted a suite with two bedrooms for a week. Emboldened, Leola said the Presidential Suite on the 10th floor was available for $600 a night. The secretary said that she would take it and asked if the hotel wanted a deposit. “No, that won’t be necessary,” Leola said. “We trust you.”

The next day was a busy one for Leola. In the morning, she booked an electric appliance manufacturers’ convention for Memorial Day weekend, a college prom and a reunion of the 82nd Airborne veterans from World War II. She turned on her answering machine during lunchtime so that she could watch the O.J. Simpson trial, but her biggest challenge came in the afternoon when a mother called to book the ballroom for her daughter’s wedding in June. Leola assured the woman that it would be no problem and asked if she would be providing the flowers or did she want the hotel to take care of it. The mother said that she would prefer the hotel to handle the floral arrangements. Then the question of valet parking came up. Once again Leola was helpful. “There’s no charge for valet parking, but we always recommend that the client tips the drivers.”
Within a few months, the Ribrock Plaza Motel was a disaster area. People kept showing up for weddings, bar mitzvahs, and Sweet Sixteen parties and were all told there were no such events. Leola had her final revenge when she read in the local paper that the motel might go bankrupt. Her phone rang, and an executive from Marriott said, “We’re prepared to offer you $200,000 for the motel.”
Leola replied. “We’ll take it, but only if you change the telephone number.” 😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND! people, stay safe, and whatever you do,
don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,
while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” ~ Lao Tzu

“Everything you need is within you, the strength, courage
and confidence to change your life. You just need to look
within yourself and find it.” ~ Amanda Ray

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear,
not absence of fear.” ~ Mark Twain

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the
attribute of the strong.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
These are one-liners that you really don’t want people to use to describe you.
It’s nicer to use these though instead of calling someone an idiot.

  1. Not the brightest light in the harbor.
  2. The light’s on but no one’s home.
  3. Not the brightest bulb in the box.
  4. A few screws short of a hardware store.
  5. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
  6. A few cards short of a deck.
  7. A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
  8. About as sharp as a marble.
  9. Only has one oar in the water.
  10. Smart as a bag of rocks.
  11. A burger short of a combo meal.
  12. The elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor.
  13. A few peas short of a casserole.
  14. A few keys short of a keyboard.
  15. Not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree.

Thursday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“I don’t want to kill you and you don’t want to be dead.”

Answer: Silverado!
A bad-dude cattle rancher by the name of McKendrick is forcing other owners off their lands by means fair or foul. Worse for these landowners, McKendrick has the local sheriff, Cobb, played by Brian Dennehy, on his payroll. Mal (Malachi) has been away from home for a number of years and is now making his way back. Along the way he befriends Emmett (Scott Glenn), his brother Jake (Kevin Costner) and Paden (Kevin Kline). Mal arrives home to find that the bad-dude’s henchmen are trying to run his father off his land and when this fails, they kill his father. Mal heads out to find Emmett who has found himself in a dire situation against the sheriff’s deputies. Mal assists by shooting one of the deputies in the hand before leveling his gun at the other and delivering the above message. “Silverado” was co-written and directed by Lawrence Kasdan, a man whose writing credits include “Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back” (1980) and “Star Wars Episode VI: The Return of the Jedi” (1983).

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“None of you understand. I’m not locked up in here with you. You’re locked up in here with me!”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
Against your royalty I attack,
Going black to white and white to black
And one by two or two by one,
Until I’m caught or the war is done.

Answer: A knight on a chessboard.

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
Each statement describes two words that when fused together create a new unrelated word (not a compound word). The clues do not necessarily indicate in which order the two words are attached. Example: This is the oldness of a tablet (pill + age = pillage).

1) This is a royal golf score.
2) This is what you get from a bovine tongue.
3) This is a distant object.
4) This is a country of water barriers.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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