Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to MONDAY JANUARY 2, 2023

GOT A LIGHT?
In a west Texas town, employees in a medium-sized warehouse noticed the smell of gas. Sensibly,
management evacuated the building, extinguishing all potential sources of ignition — lights, power,
etc. After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched.
Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration,
none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the scene of one of the technicians reaching into
his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object,
the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of
the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. The technician that was suspected
of causing the explosion had never been thought of as “bright” by his peers. 😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT REST OF THE YEAR people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A restaurant here in New York is serving a grilled cheese-flavored martini. Or
as parents put it, ‘Finally, a way to get my kids to finish their martinis.'” -Jimmy Fallon

“In China, an animal trainer taught his monkeys kung fu but then they turned on him
using their best kung fu moves. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times only teach
your monkeys your worst Kung Fu moves.” -Conan O’Brien

“Scientists said yesterday that the T. rex may have had teeth serrated like a steak knife,
which may have helped it eat meat more efficiently. Experts believe the T. rex evolved
the knife-like teeth after having so much trouble using regular silverware.” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A lawyer and two buddies were fishing on Caddo Lake in Texas when a lightning
storm hit. Most of the other boats immediately headed for the shore, but not our
friend the lawyer. Alone on the rear of his aluminum bass boat with his buddies,
this individual stood up, spread his arms wide and shouted: “HERE I AM LORD, LET
ME HAVE IT!” Needless to say, God delivered. The other two passengers on the
boat survived the lightning strike with minor burns. 😳😳😳

Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“What is so great about discovery? It is a violent, penetrative act that scars what it explores.
What you call discovery, I call the rape of the natural world.”

Answer: Jurassic Park!
When one of his dinosaurs kills a worker, John Hammond must calm his investors by getting experts in the field to endorse his park. Unfortunately the scientists that he asks for endorsement cannot, in good conscience, provide it. Chaotician Ian Malcolm subscribes to the theory that if anything can go wrong, it will. Unfortunately he turns out to be right

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Kill the pirate!”
“I am not a pirate. I happen to be a lawyer.”
“Kill the lawyer!”

Friday’s Quizzler is….
I have given you a starting word (a clue). Your job is to fill in the blanks with a 4-letter word that matches the
clue already given. This 4-letter word must complete the 7-letter word next to it. Have fun!

Therefore = ? = V_ _ TI _ _
Whirl = ? = A _ _ IR _ _
Demeanour = ? = A _ B _ _ _ T
Shoestring = ? = G _ _ _ I _ R

Answer: 1. Therefore = ergo = V e r TI g o

Whirl = spin = A s p IR i n
Demeanour = mien = A m B i e n T
Shoestring = lace = G l a c I e R

Monday’s Quizzler is…….
What is represented here?

Maine
Idaho
Nevada
Delaware

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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