Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to FRIDAY JANUARY 13, 2023

Here’s The Story……
A New York judge is ready to go through the day’s business and he is very rushed.
The first case up involves an elderly Jewish gentleman with a long beard, payos, the works.
The judge, without asking a question, says to the clerk: “Quick… get me a translator.”
Translator shows up and the judge says: “Ask him what his name is, how old is he and where does he come from?”
The translator says: “Die judge vilt vissen, vos is dein namen, vie alt bist du, and fun vie kumst du?”
The old man smiles, looks at the judge and says in perfect English with a British accent: “Your Honour.
My name is Sir Chaim Ginsbug. I shall be 82 next Thursday and I’ve come from England where I hold the
chair of Hebrew Philosophy at Oxford University.”
The translator turns to the judge and says: “Ehr zukt, ehr is Sir Chaim Ginsburg, ehr is tzwei und achtzig
yur alt, und ehr is, mit sach Yiddish philisoph, areingekummen vun Oxford.” 😳😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“There’s a new workout where people crawl like a baby. It’s a new thing, because it
strengthens your core while working your shoulders and hips. In response, babies
were like, ‘Have you seen our bodies?'” -Jimmy Fallon

“Here in California, some Starbucks stores have begun selling beer and wine. When
asked why, a spokesperson for Starbucks said, ‘Because sober people don’t
buy Michael Buble CDs.'” -Conan O’Brien

“Apple’s top designer has created a special Christmas tree that does not feature any
lights or decorations. Said the designer, ‘I didn’t know this was due today.'” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A man tell his friend, “I went to my doctor to see if he
could help me give up smoking.”
“What did he say?”
“He suggested that every time I felt like a smoke I should
reach for a bar of chocolate.”
“Did that do any good?”
“No, I can’t get the chocolate to light.” 😳😳

Thursday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean what’s the sense of risking the eight of us to save one guy?

Answer: Saving Private Ryan!
When three brothers are killed in action during WWII, Washington wants save the poor mother the grief of losing her 4th son. The only problem is that he’s stationed somewhere near the front, and no one is sure exactly how to get in touch with him. Led by Captain Miller, eight men are charged with the very dangerous mission of finding Private Ryan, and bringing him home.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Travelling through space ain’t like dusting crops boy.”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
Does your first name have another homophonic meaning? Here are some examples, wade and
Wade or wait and Wayte. See how many words and first names you can identify. Remember, spellings may vary.

  1. To throw away, starts with C
  2. A very strong wind, starts with G
  3. A North American songbird having a rust-red breast gray or black upper plumage, starts with R
  4. Magnificent; sumptuous, starts with R
  5. Any of various often crested birds of the genera Garrulus, Cyanocitta, Aphelocoma, and related
    genera within the family Corvidae, often having a loud, harsh call, starts with J
  6. To delay or be late in going, coming, or doing, starts with T
  7. To place in the ground, starts with B
  8. A church that is or once was part of a monastery or convent, starts with A
  9. The superior of a monastery, starts with A
  10. A leaf or one side of a leaf, as of a book, letter, newspaper, or manuscript, starts with P
  11. Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence, starts with F
  12. A usually portable device for raising heavy objects by means of force applied with a lever, starts with J

Answer: 1. chuck, Chuck

  1. gale, Gail
  2. robin, Robyn
  3. rich, Rich
  4. jay, Jay
  5. tarry, Terry
  6. bury, Berry
  7. abbey, Abby
  8. abbot, Abbot
  9. page, Paige
  10. faith, Faith
  11. jack, Jack

Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
What does the star represent in the rebus:

A N O
T * I
TENT

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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