Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


The English Language
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let’s face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don’t fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn’t the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn’t the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn’t a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Sing like no one’s listening, love like you’ve never been hurt,
dance like nobody’s watching, and live like it’s heaven on earth.”

“Curiosity about life in all of its aspects, I think, is still the
secret of great creative people.” – Leo Burnett

“Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality
to be experienced.”– Soren Kierkegaard

“The unexamined life is
not worth living.” — Socrates

“Turn your wounds
into wisdom.” — Oprah Winfrey

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
How many letters are there in the alphabet?
Noel, noel, noel, noel … the angels did say…
E.T. went home.
Get rid of X. There’s too many unknowns in the world already!
(Only one vowel left, or is that “Anly ana vawal laft” This may be stretching it a bit,
but not unless you consider, as our good friends in Canada say: Good day, A!
And we all know that M&Ms melt in your mouth, so it’s safe to count them out.
And of course, Y not.
We might as well put off using U until later in the year: See U in September
TWA just took off!! 😳😳😳😳

Thursday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“All you’ve ever FEARED has always been right inside you”

Answer: “The Wizard of Oz”
This is said by the good witch Glinda, from “The Wizard of Oz”, to the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion. She explains that the protagonists, who each sought out the Wizard to request something they felt they sorely lacked, actually had the abilities they were so desperately seeking – they just needed to believe in themselves and unlock their abilities. Glinda follows this up with several examples of where these characters, during their journey, have demonstrated the very traits they believed they lack.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
‘my mother – a waitress’

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
Can you decipher this?

Step Pets Pets

ANSWER: One step forward, two steps back.

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
It was Valentines Day at Pelican High. Five boys named Adam, Jose, Isaiah, Frank, and John have secret sweethearts named Carrie, Grace, Laura, Mary, and Nellie. The five boys decided to pick a different number of blossoms and a different flower for their sweethearts.

The number of blossoms are: 3, 5, 8, 9 and 10.

The flowers are: Blazing Stars, Blue Vervain, Coneflowers, Prairie Clovers and Stiff Goldenrods.

Can you figure out the number of blossoms and the type of flower each boy picked and the girl to whom he presented the bouquet?

  1. Adam picked exactly two fewer Blue Vervain than Isaiah picked of his flower.
  2. Frank picked Stiff Goldenrods for his sweetheart. Nellie received nine blossoms from her beau.
  3. Mary received fewer blossoms than the girl whose admirer handed her a bunch of Blazing Stars but more blossoms than at least one other young lady. Jose picked flowers for Laura.
  4. Grace received the next-higher number of flowers than the girl who accepted Prairie Clovers but fewer blossoms than John’s sweetheart.
  5. Isaiah picked a bouquet of Blazing Stars.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,


CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. ​ ​​ ​ ​


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