Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Why ask why

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

If nothing ever sticks to teflon, how do they make teflon stick to the pan?

If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

Why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor when you can’t drink and drive?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

The world’s first supermarket chain to only sell vegan foods, which was called
Veganz with a ‘z,’ has announced they will have to declare bankruptcy and shut
all their stores. When asked what went wrong, the vegan supermarket said, ‘
We’re a vegan supermarket.'” -James Corden

“Kim Kardashian said during a Q & A yesterday that she’d like to take a selfie
with Jesus. Though I think most people would say that
Jesus has suffered enough.” -Seth Meyers

“The CEO of Starbucks has pledged to hire 10,000 refugees. So if you think
they’re writing your name incorrectly on the cups now…” -Conan O’Brien 😳😳

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
It was time for the final and the student depending upon
getting at least one right answer on the chemistry test.
The question was “If H2O is water, what is H2O4?”
This was a quick question for most, but it took the student some thinking time.
Finally, he wrote down his answer: For drinking, washing, cleaning…

Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
‘my mother – a waitress’

Answer: Mildred Pierce!
The film was based on a 1941 book by James M. Cain, who also wrote ‘The Postman Always Rings Twice’. Joan Crawford won the Best Actress for her role as the mother of an ungrateful daughter, played by Ann Blyth. The daughter’s greed for material possessions was funded by her over indulgent mother, who took whatever work she could find to earn money. The quotation came after Veda, the daughter, discovered the waitress uniform, which she thought had been bought for a maid, belonged to her mother. The other options are also films starring Joan Crawford.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
‘That still small voice that people won’t listen to’

Friday’s Quizzler is….​
It was Valentines Day at Pelican High. Five boys named Adam, Jose, Isaiah, Frank, and John have secret sweethearts named Carrie, Grace, Laura, Mary, and Nellie. The five boys decided to pick a different number of blossoms and a different flower for their sweethearts.

The number of blossoms are: 3, 5, 8, 9 and 10.

The flowers are: Blazing Stars, Blue Vervain, Coneflowers, Prairie Clovers and Stiff Goldenrods.

Can you figure out the number of blossoms and the type of flower each boy picked and the girl to whom he presented the bouquet?

  1. Adam picked exactly two fewer Blue Vervain than Isaiah picked of his flower.
  2. Frank picked Stiff Goldenrods for his sweetheart. Nellie received nine blossoms from her beau.
  3. Mary received fewer blossoms than the girl whose admirer handed her a bunch of Blazing Stars but more blossoms than at least one other young lady. Jose picked flowers for Laura.
  4. Grace received the next-higher number of flowers than the girl who accepted Prairie Clovers but fewer blossoms than John’s sweetheart.
  5. Isaiah picked a bouquet of Blazing Stars.

ANSWER: Adam: 8, Blue Vervain, Mary
Jose: 3, Prairie Clovers, Laura
Isaiah: 10, Blazing Stars, Carrie
Frank: 5, Stiff Goldenrods, Grace
John: 9, Coneflowers, Nellie

Monday’s Quizzler is…….
A man working for a secret organisation goes into town but does not want to be discovered.
So he makes up another name. That name was Horobod. Can you decipher his real name?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,


CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. ​ ​​ ​ ​


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