Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to TUESDAY MARCH 14, 2023

Here’s The Story……
There was a farmer who had many pigs. One day someone came to the farm and asked the farmer,
“What do you use to feed your pigs?””Well, I give them acorn, corn, vegetable scraps and things like that. Why?”
“Because I am from the Animals Protection Association and I think you don’t feed them like you should,
they shouldn’t eat wastes.” Then he fined the farmer. Some days later, another person arrived and asked the same
question. The farmer answered, “Well, I feed them very well. I give them fish, whole grains, hot corn mash and
as much fresh fruit and vegetables as I can get my hands on. Why?” “Because I am from the United Nations Organization
and I think it’s unfair that you feed your pigs like that when there are people dying with nothing to eat.” And he fined the farmer.
Finally, another man came in and asked the same question. The hesitant farmer answered after a minute of careful thought:
“Well, I give five dollars to each pig so they can buy whatever it is they want.” 😳😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t
forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Chocolate maker Hershey is reportedly expecting to cut its global workforce by about
15 percent. That’s right, for the first time ever, chocolate is giving up people for Lent.” -Seth Meyers

“Scientists have found a way to grow human tissue on apples. Now the only thing
left for them to discover is a REASON to grow human tissue on apples.” -Conan O-Brien

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed.
Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams.
The people who produce the bottles. The truck drivers who deliver the beer and the retailers who sell it.
If I didn’t drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered.
Then I say to myself, “It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true
than be selfish and worry about my liver.” 😳😳😳😎

Monday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“They was giving me ten thousand watts a day you know, and I’m hot to trot. The next woman takes me on is gonna
light up like a pinball machine and pay off in silver dollars.”

Answer: One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest!
Sent to jail for statutory rape, McMurphy believes that it will be easier to serve his time if he can spend it in an insane asylum. What he doesn’t figure on is going head to head with Nurse Ratched, who prefers to be in complete control of her ward, and isn’t about to lose to McMurphy. This remark was made after he comes back from a series of ECT treatments (Electro-Convulsive Therapy), prescribed as a form of punishment for stirring things up.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“You’re insane!”
“I thought I was a Pisces.”

MONDAY’S MOVIE TRIVIA DIVIA OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS KIM HILLYARD FOR SUPER SOLVING! 👍👍👍👍

Monday’s Quizzler is….
Based on the clue in parentheses, find a four-letter word that can be inserted backwards into the blank to complete a longer word.

Example: di____ve (a defeat)
Answer: dissolve (“A defeat” gives you LOSS, which is placed backwards in the blank: di_SSOL_ve.)

s____ing (profound, extreme, or intense)
si____ll (inspired by a feeling of reverence)
re____ed (draw with force)
s____hot (to extend over)

ANSWER: 1. speeding (DEEP – s_PEED_ing)

sidewall (AWED – si_DEWA_ll)
regarded (DRAG – re_GARD_ed)
snapshot (SPAN – s_NAPS_hot)

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….
Once again, the Booker Prize panel are sitting. And again an excerpt from a book has some key words missing.
Can you fill in the blanks so the story makes sense and also spot the connection between them?

Mr. Ix was speeding through the streets of Wimbledon, when he was pulled over by a police officer.
“It isn’t my !” wailed Mr. Ix noisily. “It you right,” replied the officer.
“Will it come to ?” Ix inquired. “If you keep up this it will,” the officer replied severely.
“It is not as if I gained any ,” Ix said ____edly. “I would to _ you off with a caution,” admitted the officer, “but I can’t allow you through the _ on this one,” he continued.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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