Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to MONDAY APRIL 3, 2023

Here’s The Story…..
Ken and Melba had finished their breakfast at the retirement home and were relaxing in the
library. “You know,” said Melba, “today, in most marriage ceremonies,
they don’t use the word ‘obey’ anymore.”
“Too bad, isn’t it?” retorted Ken. “It used to lend a little humor to the occasion.” 😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t
forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A new study reveals Americans are getting fatter and giving up on their diets. The
study was conducted by going to a water park for five minutes.” -Conan O’Brien

“They’re considering a new 10-cent fee on grocery bags here in New York. My mom said,
‘Who’s laughing at the eight-thousand bags under the sink NOW?'” -Jimmy Fallon

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the teacher was asking.
“Next question,” announced the instructor. “How would you like to be seen by the opposite sex?”
I was thinking about my answer when the young woman next to me turned and asked,
“How do you spell ‘intellectual?'”😳😳😳

Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Yep, life’s a trade off. It’s finally legal to smoke dope, but you have to have cancer.”
“Are you dying?”
“Not today.”

Answer: Stepmom!
Jackie Harrison is a bitterly divorced woman, who hates her ex-husband’s new fiancée. Unfortunately, Jackie is also dying of cancer, and has to get past her hatred, to train this interloper how to raise her children after she’s gone. This exchange occurs when Isabel first learns that Jackie has the dreaded disease.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?” – Gwen Harrison

Friday’s Quizzler is….
There are two groups of three-letter words used in the sentences below. The first missing words of each sentence
are anagrams of each other, and the second missing words are also anagrams of each other. Can you find them ?

It is only _ that we use a trap to catch a _, instead of having a cat in the house!
To staunch the bleeding from a wound suffered by an animal, people used to _ some hot _ onto the wound at one time.
To _ into the mysteries held within the human psyche and enjoy these mysteries to the fullest, is the objective of any _.

ANSWER: 1. It is only APT that we use a trap to catch a RAT, instead of having a cat in the house!

To staunch the bleeding from a wound suffered by an animal, people used to PAT some hot TAR onto the wound at one time.
To TAP into the mysteries held within the human psyche and enjoy these mysteries to the fullest, is the objective of any ART.

Anagram Groups
Group I: APT, PAT, TAP
Group II: RAT, TAR, ART

Monday’s Quizzler is…….

Shape Series
Complete the series by choosing the correct shape from the four options.
Shape Series

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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