WELCOME to TUESDAY May 9, 2023
Here’s the Story….
According to “The Australian,” an airliner recently encountered severe vibration in flight.
The captain decided to make an emergency landing, and switched on the seat belt sign.
The vibration stopped immediately.
A passenger emerged from a lavatory and explained that he had been jogging in place inside.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY!, people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t
forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“A package of salad mix that was sold in a Florida Walmart was found to contain a dead bat.
This is shocking news – someone shopping at Walmart bought a salad.” -Conan O’Brien
“According to a new report, Amazon is now worth twice as much as Walmart. In response,
Walmart announced that they’re planning to open a second checkout lane.” -Seth Meyers
“There is a new trend in U.K. corporate policy where employees are being given paid time
off so that they can acclimate a new pet to their home. They’re calling it ‘pawternity’ leave.
Paid time off for pets should not be a thing. Here is how that discussion should go: ‘Excuse
me, boss, I want to get a new dog, but I need a week off to bond with the animal.’
And your boss goes, ‘Oh, OK, cool. You’re fired.'” -James Corden
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A seven-year-old boy is sitting at the dinner table with his parents. Suddenly
he announces, “Me and Janie next door are gonna get married!”
“Oh?” says the mother, amused. “And how old is Janie?”
“Six,” replies the boy.
“Well,” says the father, “what are you going to do for money?”
“I get 5 dollars a week allowance,” says the son, “and Janie gets 2.
We figured that if we put them together, we’ll be okay.”
“I see,” says the father. “But what are you going to do if you have any children?”
“Well,” says the boy, “so far we’ve been lucky.” 😳😳😳
Monday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“When you’re starving, you’ll do anything.”
Answer: All Quiet On The Western Front!
Felix Kammerer plays Paul Bäumer, the lead character through whose eyes we see the battle scenes in “All Quiet On The Western Front”. He says this during his attempt to sneak into a farmer’s enclosure, along with his friend Stanislaus Katczinsky, played by Albrecht Schuch. They are seeking to see what sort of farm animal they might be able to steal, as the two soldiers are close to starving during the final days of World War I and German forces are being depleted more and more.
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“This is our home. This is our fortress. This is where we make our stand.”
Monday’s Quizzler is….
You are in a room that is an 8x8x8 perfect cube. There are no windows, or doors (don’t ask me how you got in there!) In the center of the floor there is a 12 inch pipe that is sticking 6 inches out of the floor. In the bottom of the pipe is a ping pong ball with a diameter that is one millimeter smaller than the inner diameter of the pipe. You have a 12 inch piece of string, a match, a magnifying glass, a 6″ ruler and a paper clip. How do you get the ping pong ball out of the hole?
Answer: Pee in the hole.
Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….
Fill in the words that are empty by using words that will connect with the previous one.
EXAMPLE: Towel, Rack. (You have the words Towel and Rack, but when put together it becomes “Towel rack”.)
Try to connect candy to washer.
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LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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