WELCOME to FRIDAY JULY 24th, 2026
Here’s The Story…..
Once upon a time, a pasture full of cattle was hit by a tornado. Most of the cattle were
knocked over. After this happened several times, one of them started to notice a pattern.
“Yo, Bessie!”
“Yeah, Bossie?”
“When we get a tornado, do you always get knocked down?”
“Yeah. You too?”
“Yeah. And ol’ Ferdinand over there, he gets knocked down too, right?”
“Yeah! And my daughter Bootsie gets knocked down, but my little son Frankie doesn’t.
He stumbles a bit, but always stays up. I wonder why that is…”
“That’s what I’ve been thinking about.”
So they ate some hay, thought about it a bit, ate some more hay, got milked, ate some
more hay, took a nap, ate some more hay, kept ol’ Ferdinand happy, ate some more hay,
made the bettors on squares E6 and H7 happy (albeit in quite a different way from Ferdinand),
ate some more hay, and went to sleep for the night.
During the night, Bossie had a dream, of two sailing ships. One was a large schooner, the other
a tiny little fishing boat. A storm came up suddenly. Waves broke over the sides of both ships.
The crews hurriedly pulled down the sails. The fishing boat just hauled down its two little sails,
and waited out the storm. But the schooner was in trouble. Its men kept slipping in the rigging,
the wet sails would stick together, and finally, the wind caught the sails
and just pushed the larger ship right over.
The next morning, Bessie and Bossie were talking about their dreams. Bessie pointed out that
Bossie’s was the solution to the mystery of why only small male cattle can remain standing during
a tornado. “You see,” said Bessie, “it’s mainly a matter of catching the wind. You and I and
Ferdinand are big, so the wind pushes us a lot, and over we go. But little Frankie doesn’t have
much area for the wind to push on, so he’s a lot steadier.”
“Hmmmm. Well, that makes sense,” replied Bossie,
“but that still doesn’t explain why Bootsie doesn’t get knocked over!”
“Well, you’re right there,” admitted Bessie, “but all I know is,
wee bulls wobble, but they don’t fall down!”😯😂
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL WEEKEND ‘people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
Classic Long Jokes That Never Fail
These classic long jokes have been making people laugh for years.
🍺 I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes… she gave me a hug.
🧠 I asked my brain to stop overthinking… now it’s just thinking about why I said that.
💼 I tried to start a company selling land mines… it didn’t take off.
📱 My phone battery lasts longer than my relationships… and it’s always low too.
🛒 I went grocery shopping and forgot my wallet… now I’m just emotionally invested in food.
🏋️ I joined a gym to get in shape… apparently “round” is a shape.
🧾 I told my boss I needed a raise… he gave me more work instead, so technically I climbed the ladder.
🧊 I’m on a whiskey diet… I’ve already lost three days.
🚗 My car and I have something in common—we both don’t start in the morning.
💻 I love pressing F5 at work… it makes me feel like I’m doing something productive.
🧹 I cleaned my house for hours… now I can’t find anything, including my motivation.
🍕 I ordered a pizza for one… the pizza misunderstood and brought emotional support.
🧾 I tried budgeting… now I’m financially stable in theory.
🛏️ My bed and I are in a serious relationship… we just can’t quit each other.
🎧 I listen to motivational speeches while sleeping… now I dream about working harder.
📉 I invested in patience… still waiting for returns.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!
Who starred in “Rhinestone” and “Cobra” in the 1980’s and made a cameo in “Staying Alive”?
Answer: Sylvester Stallone!
If I listed the movies “Rocky” or “Rambo”, it would have been easier but Sylvester Stallone released a variety of movies in the 1980’s. “Stayin’ Alive”, a sequel to “Saturday Night Fever”, had John Travolta’s character passing Stallone while walking down the street. “Rhinestone” was a 1984 musical that had Stallone singing and co-starring with country music legend, Dolly Parton. “Cobra” (1986) was back to Stallone’s typical role as an action star where he portrayed a police officer chasing down a dangerous group called the New Order.
Fridays July Movie Trivia of the day!
Johnny Galecki, Leonard of “The Big Bang Theory”, played what character in “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation”?
Thursday’s Quizzler is….
In English, “re” is a prefix usually meaning “again”, such as in “rebuild” (build again). However, there are many words starting with “re” which have a totally different meaning without the “re”.
You will be given two definitions, one for a word starting with “re”, and one for the remaining word without the “re” (either definition could be given first).
Example: exhausting / ceasing employment
Answer: tiring / retiring
- fit for royalty / young lady
- ruler in place of a minor monarch / man
- Pope’s representative / put in a lower position
- day before an event / town council president
- ungraciously turn down / in good physical shape
- important assignment / temporary recovery
- deliberately annoy or hurt / short period of rest
- practice a play / vehicle for a dead body
Answer: 1. regal / gal
2. regent / gent
3. legate / relegate
4. eve / reeve
5. rebuff / buff
6. mission / remission
7. spite / respite
8. rehearse / hearse
FRIDAY’s Quizzler….
Below the surface I reside
For your whole life, there do I hide
If any part of me were to appear
The situation may be severe
In a desolate place I may be seen
Just a remnant of what had once been
While one’s soul pends for a home celestial
I’m in a fixed location terrestrial
What am I?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com: https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. 😳😳
The World According to the Eucman! 