WELCOME to THURSDAY OCTOBER 22nd, 2026
Here’s The Story….
The Philgelos or “Laughter-lover” is probably the oldest compilation of jokes in existence;
it contains some 265 jokes. It is said that the famous Monty Python Parrot
sketch has its origins in a joke told in the Philogelos.
Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights.
It appears that shortest war on record was between Zanzibar and Britain in 1896.
Zanzibar [now part of Tanzania] surrendered after 38 minutes.
What kind of lighting did Noah use for the ark? Floodlights and Ark lights
Which English King invented the fireplace? Alfred the Grate.
How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars.
I’m desperately trying to establish why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
Last words from a general in the American Civil War, ‘Nonsense.
They couldn’t hit an elephant at this dist……………’
Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied, ‘In silence.’ [From the Philogelos]
What’s the difference between Joan of Arc and a canoe? One is Maid of Orleans and the other is made of wood.
Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger,
he said, ‘I’ve had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.’ – Dated to the *Philogelos 4th Century CE]
One that almost got away:
Why did Henry VIII have so many wives? He liked to chop and change.
Have a great day or pretend to! That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!
Have a WONDERFUL THURSDAY’ people, stay safe, and whatever you do,
don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
GUARANTED TO MAKE YOU LAFF!
Archaeological Funnies
Archaeologists are fickle. They’re always dating other people.
“Anyone who fails to see the evolutionary link between man and ape has never used the restroom at a Walmart.”
Most mothers tell their daughters to marry doctors…
I told mine to marry an archaeologist because the older she gets, the more interested he will be in her.
Question: What did Richard III say when a planning proposal was submitted for building a car park…
Answer: “Over my dead body”
Two archaeologists were excavating a tomb in Egypt.
1st Archaeologist: I just found another tomb of a mummified pharaoh!
2nd Archaeologist: Are you serious?
1st Archaeologist: No bones about it!
Q: Why did the archaeologist go bankrupt?
A: Because his career was in ruins.
Q: What do you get in a 5-star pyramid?
A: A tomb with a view.
WEDNESDAY’s Movie Trivia of the day!
‘The Godfather’ series of films is a three-part epic that took 19 years to complete.
Which director brought us this monumental film trilogy?
Answer: The correct answer was Francis Ford Coppola!
Coppola’s ‘Godfather’ trilogy has made a major impact on American culture, from its famous phrases to its contribution to bringing issues about the criminal world to the forefront. The three ‘Godfather’ films (released in 1972, 1974 and 1990, respectively), featured a magnificent array of great American actors, including Marlon Brando, Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, Robert Duvall, Diane Keaton, Andy Garcia and Talia Shire.
THURSDAYS Movie Trivia of the day!
Which grand, masterful film epic directed by Steven Spielberg won an Academy Award for Best Picture of 1993?
WEDNESDAY’s Quizzler….
A great warrior did not return from the hunt. His family gave him up for dead, all except his
youngest son who each day would ask, “Where is my father? Where is my father?”
The child’s older brothers, who were magicians, finally went forth to find him. They came upon
his broken spear and a pile of bones. The first son assembled the bones into a skeleton; the
second son put flesh upon the bones; the third son breathed life into the flesh.
The warrior arose and walked into the village where there was great celebration. He said, “I will
give a fine gift of a cow tail switch to the one who has brought me back to life.” [The Cow Tail
Switch would be considered a most prestigious gift, a symbol of high honor and acclaim.]
Each one of his sons cried out, “Give it to me, for I have done the most.”
The first son said, “It was I who gathered and assembled your bones.”
“And Father it was I, your second son, who labored to put flesh upon the bones.”
“Yes, but I was the one that breathed life into the flesh”, said the third son, “So the cow tail switch should go to me.”
“Humm, all true, I could not have finer sons than you.”
Which son was given the Cow Tail Switch?
Answer: ” I will give the gift to my youngest son,” said the warrior. “For it is this child who saved my life.
For a man is never truly dead until he is forgotten!”
THURSday’s Quizzler is….
Five couples from San Francisco were celebrating Valentine’s Day with an outing they had planned (one couple went to the beach) and enjoyed. However, each husband had surprised his wife with a special vacation trip. Can you determine the couples’ names, their outing of choice, and vacation destination (one couple is going to Canada) from the clues provided below?
- Neither Jonas nor Kim will be leaving the United States, though they are not traveling together.
- At the restaurant, one couple talked about visiting both Madrid and Barcelona.
- Alice is not married to Mark, who did not take his wife to a hockey game or a restaurant.
- The couple going to Hawaii is either Denise and her husband or the couple who went skiing on Valentine’s Day.
- Neither Paul nor Kevin enjoy dancing, but Jenny, who is going to Mexico, does enjoy it. Kevin is going to Alaska and hopes to hit the ski slopes.
- Paul and his wife love hockey and want to see another NHL game on their trip. Laura planned her dinner date with either Mark or Bill.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com: https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
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