Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Wednesday, October 4, 2017.            
True Internet addiction…
You Are Internet Addicted When:
You kiss your girlfriend’s/boyfriend’s home page.
Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them.
You find yourself brainstorming for new subjects to search.
You refuse to go to a vacation spot with no electricity and no phone lines.
You finally do take that vacation, but only after buying a new cell phone and a laptop.
You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap… and your child in the overhead compartment.
And even your night dreams are in HTML.
You find yourself typing “com” after every period when using a word processor.com.
You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV, even though you’ve never had heart problems before.
Your pet has its own home page.
You realize there is not a sound in the house and you have no idea where your children are.
You check your mail. It says “no new messages.” So you check it again.
You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
You don’t know the gender of three of your closest friends, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
Your husband tells you he’s had the beard for 2 months.
You start looking for hot HTML addresses in public restrooms.
You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.
You tell the cab driver you live at http://123.elm.street/house/bluetrim.html
You actually try that 123.elm.street address.
Your spouse makes a new rule: “The laptop cannot come to bed.”
You are so familiar with the WWW that you find the search engines useless.
You forget what year it is.
You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
You ask your doctor to implant a gig in your brain.
Your spouse says communication is important in a marriage… so you buy her an iPhone so you can face-time her. 
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Wednesday people and whatever you do,
don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
DAILY QUOTES… 
“Microsoft founder Bill Gates gave a speech yesterday. And in that speech, he apologized for making the ctrl-alt-delete function on computers so complicated. But then he added, I mean, I’m as sorry as I can be about something that made me $85 billion.” -James Corden
“I read that Taco Bell will start serving alcohol at some locations. So the next time you think that YOU’RE having a bad day, imagine the guy who gets cut off by the cashier at Taco Bell.” -Jimmy Fallon
“Eighty years ago today, J. R. R. Tolkien’s book ‘The Hobbit’ was released. To give you an idea what 80 years feels like, watch the movie.” -Seth Meyers
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. 
Nancy was Catholic, but her fiance, Chris, was not. Since my friends were planning to be married in the Catholic Church, Chris made sure to listen carefully throughout their prenuptial sessions. At one meeting the priest turned to Chris and told him, “Since you are not Catholic, we shall have the ceremony without Eucharist.”
Later that day, Chris was noticeably upset, so Nancy asked what was wrong. “I don’t understand,” he said. “How can we have the ceremony without me?”😐😱😎
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???  
‘Today’s special, Vladikoff’s Vodka Surprise! We got Vladikoff’s vodka…SURPRISE!’
ANSWER: McHale’s Navy!

 

Wednesdays Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??   

  ‘Boy, this bird is dry. Haven’t you people ever heard of basting?’
 
 
Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….  
Which letter comes next in the following sequence?
S, N, E, P, O, H, C, _
ANSWER: E.  Why? Each group of four consecutive letters, when read in reverse, form a word:

SNEP – pens
NEPO – open
EPOH – hope
POHC – chop
OHCE – echo
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
In this teaser, you are to start with the letter ‘M’, and then each time, add a letter and shuffle it to make a new word.
You need to continue this process until you reach the word ‘MIRACLE’.
Not including ‘M’, you must do this in six (6) turns.
Good luck.
M
_ _
_ _ _
_ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _
M I R A C L E
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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