Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

funny-halloween-meme-2
WELCOME to Tuesday, October 31, 2017.                 
Halloween Punography….. 
Why doesn’t McDonald’s sell hotdogs?
Are eyebrows considered facial hair?
At a movie theater which arm rest is yours?
If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Why are there no ‘B’ batteries?
If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his iPod?
If man evolved from monkeys, how come we still have monkeys?
How do you handcuff a one-armed man?
When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?
If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
If you are bald, what hair color do they put on your driver’s license?
If God sneezes, what should you say?
Is it still illegal to park next to a fire hydrant, even if your car is on fire?
If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?
If a baby’s leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn’t come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?
If a mime is arrested, do they tell him he has a right to talk?
In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather “macaroni”?
Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions?
If vampires can’t see their reflections, why is their hair always so neat?
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Do they have the word “dictionary” in the dictionary?
Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot and everyone driving slower than you is a moron?
Can you daydream at night?
Why do they call the little candy bars “fun sizes”. Wouldn’t it be more fun to eat a big one?
What is a picture of a thousand words worth?
Why does quicksand work slowly?
Can crop circles be square?
If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don’t they fall through the floor?
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people and whatever you do,
don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
DAILY QUOTES… 

Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the face. – Helen Keller
To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others.
You need to accept yourself. – Thich Nhat Hanh
Our self-respect tracks our choices. Every time we act in harmony with our authentic self and our heart, we earn our respect. It is that simple. Every choice matters. – Dan Coppersmith
The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassions, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen. – Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
Why should we worry about what others think of us, do we have more confidence in their opinions than we do our own? – Brigham Young
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. 
Trouser was normally a happy-go-lucky dog. He would chase tennis balls, play with other doggies, and eat his dinner without a fuss. He was a dog without a care. But on that fateful autumn afternoon, it was to be different. Trouser’s owners were walking him along a trail at the park, when suddenly from out of the bushes jumped a man all dressed in black. He had white paint on his face, and was gesturing annoyingly at Trouser’s masters. This strange person spoke not a word, but proceeded to pretend that he was trapped in a box and that he was pulling on a long rope. Seeing the sheer horror on his masters’ faces, Trouser took it upon himself to rectify the situation. With a low growl he jumped and sank his teeth into this annoying pseudo clown’s leg. Trouser immediately got a sickened look in his eyes and began to vomit wildly. He then dragged his tongue all over the ground in an effort to remove the man’s foul essence from his mouth. For Trouser had learned that …. a mime is a terrible thing to taste.😐
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???  
‘Can I tell you my secret now? I see dead people!’
ANSWER: The Sixth Sense! This is probably the best known saying from this movie. 

 

Tuesdays Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??  

‘You know the difference between me and you? I make this look good!’

 
 
 
Monday’s Quizzler is……….
What phrase is illustrated here?
Injection 1: Rumour Shot
Patient: “That tickles.”
Injection 2: Hearsay Shot
Patient: “Didn’t feel it.”
Injection 3: Fact Shot
Patient: “Ouch!”
ANSWER:  The truth hurts.

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
In a sylasearch I give you a syllable-starter, which is the first syllable in the words you are to find. I will also give you a listing of the other syllables that you must use to figure out the 8 words.
Syllable List – al, cute, fec, form, fume, i, ma, mis, mit, nent, se, sion, son, tion, ty
Syllable-starter: per
How many syllables each word has:
1. (2)
2. (2)
3. (2)
4. (3)
5. (3)
6. (3)
7. (3)
8. (5)

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO OUR RESIDENT GENIUS MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙇🙇🙇🙅😁

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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