WELCOME to WEDNESDAY APRIL 29th, 2026

Here’s The Story…..
The rain was a persistent rhythmic tapping against the cracked bus windows, a stark contrast to the heavy silence inside. A woman stepped out of the shadows and onto the platform, clutching a bundle in her arms like it was the last scrap of hope in a city that had run out of it. She offered her fare, but the driver didn’t look at the coins. He looked at the child. His face twisted into a mask of pure, unadulterated revulsion. “Sweet Mother of Mercy,” he rasped, his voice like gravel in a blender. “That is the most grotesque-looking kid I’ve ever seen in all my years on the graveyard shift.

“The woman didn’t scream. She didn’t cry. She just felt the cold iron of fury settle in her gut. She retreated to the back of the bus, the dim yellow light flickering overhead as she slumped into a seat. “The driver,” she hissed to the man sitting in the adjacent shadows, her knuckles white. “He just crossed a line no man should ever cross. “The man leaned forward, the brim of his fedora casting a jagged line across his eyes. He didn’t blink. “Then don’t let him get away with it, sister,” he rumbled. “Go up there and let him have it. Teach him some manners. “He reached out a gloved hand. “Go on. I’ll hold your baboon for you.” That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY ‘people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

 
 
A punny story…
I was lost with my buddies in the woods and came accross a bacon tree.
“OH boy!” Shouted my friend, running frantically to get a piece of bacon
off the bacon tree. He immediately was shot dead after grabbing the meat
and I shouted “hold up! This ain’t no bacon tree, this is a ham bush.”😮😅😎
 

 
Punagraphy….. 
They’re truly punderful…
Warning: contains cringe-inducing wordplay
About a month before he died, my uncle had his back covered in lard. After that, he went downhill fast.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
A man just assaulted me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy.
Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I’m excited to see how they turn out.
My colleague can no longer attend next weeks Innuendo Seminar so I have to fill her slot instead.
Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
I’m a big fan of whiteboards. I find them quite re-markable.
Doctor: “Sir, I’m afraid your DNA is backwards.” Me: “And?”
I’m reading a horror story in Braille. Something bad is about to happen… I can feel it.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day.
Just burned 2,000 calories. That’s the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race? It ended in a tie!
Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.
The future, the present and the past walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.
A plateau is the highest form of flattery. 

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  
Which 1994 science fiction film starring Kurt Russell and James Spader involves an ancient device that allows travel to another planet ruled by Jaye Davidson, a being posing as an Egyptian god?

 Answer: The correct answer was Stargate! You know the story. Ancient history is cool. But ancient history with aliens? Perfection.
The film centers on a mysterious ring-shaped device that opens a wormhole to another planet, where a powerful being named Ra has been pretending to be an Egyptian god. It made a lot of sense in the ’90s. Trust me. Kurt Russell is the no-nonsense military guy, and James Spader is the brainy linguist who cracks the code. And if you think we’re missing an archetype or two, don’t worry, we’ve got the villain and the love interest covered as well. The movie mixes sci-fi with ancient mythology in a way that shouldn’t quite work, but somehow kinda does. Or at least did in the 1990s.
It ended up launching a whole franchise of TV shows, because once you open a portal to another planet, it’s really very hard to stop.

Tuesdays Movie Trivia of the day!  
What 1995 crime thriller directed by David Fincher follows two detectives tracking a serial killer
who is motivated by the weaknesses he sees in others?

Monday’s Quizzler is….
Below is a (very) short story with 10 capitalized words or phrases which are anagrams of words that all fit in a certain category. Can you find the anagrams and determine the category?

NOTE: One of the answers contains two words.

A recently PAROLED man named Ari was going to ROB A PEARL boat of all of its FIG FARE. The boat was just off of the SHORE. He put on his BALM and donned his TOGA to SNEAK aboard. ARI GOT ALL of the NEAT HELP he needed from a safety pin that kept his toga IN PLACE.

ANSWER:  
 A recently PAROLED man named Ari was going to ROB A PEARL boat of all of its FIG FARE. The boat was just off of the SHORE. He put on his BALM and donned his TOGA to SNEAK aboard. ARI GOT ALL of the NEAT HELP he needed from a safety pin that kept his toga IN PLACE.

Answer
LEOPARD
POLAR BEAR
GIRAFFE
HORSE
LAMB
GOAT
SNAKE
ALLIGATOR
ELEPHANT
PELICAN
Category: Animals

Monday’s Quizzler is….😎😎
What is represented below?

Der Der
Der Der
Der Der
Der Der
Der Der

CALOVERE

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.  😳😳