WELCOME to WEDNESDAY AUGUST 12th, 2026

Here’s The Story…..
An American lawyer invited a Czechoslovakian friend to stay with him in his
mountain cabin. Early in the morning, the lawyer and his Czechoslovakian
friend went out to pick berries for their morning breakfast. As they were
picking blueberries, along came two big bears – a male and a female.
The lawyer, seeing the two bears, climbed a tree.
His friend wasn’t so lucky and the male bear caught him and swallowed him whole.
The lawyer drove his car to town as fast as he could to get a policeman. The policeman
took his gun and ran to the berry patch with the lawyer.
Sure enough, the two bears were still there. “He’s in THAT one!” said the lawyer,
pointing to the male bear.
The policeman looked at the bears, took careful aim with his gun, and SHOT THE FEMALE.
“What did you do that for!” shouted the lawyer, “I said he was in the other bear!”
“Exactly,” answered the policeman.
“Would YOU believe a lawyer who told you that the Czech was in the Male?” 😯
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY ‘people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

 
Classic Jokes That Never Fail
There was a man who had two dogs, named “Commonsense” and “Trouble”.
He always brought his dogs to the park every evening. One day, he only brought “Trouble”
to the park, and left “Commonsense” at home. While the man was happy playing frisbee
with his friends, “Trouble” disappeared. The man was sad and panicky. He looked for his
dog everywhere but could not find it. A lady realized it and asked the man, “What are you
looking for?” The man replied, “I’m looking for ‘Trouble’…” “Pardon…” said the lady. The
man replied in a higher tone, “I am looking for ‘TROUBLE’!” The lady was annoyed and asked,
“Where’s your COMMONSENSE?” The man answered, “At home…”😯

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!    
Based on the novel by Joan Lindsay, this movie tells of the disappearance of a teacher and three
schoolgirls while on a Valentine’s Day school outing. What is it called? 
 
Answer: Picnic at Hanging Rock (1975)
“Picnic at Hanging Rock” is an Australian film set in the year 1900. Neither the film nor the novel on which it is based ever explains exactly what happened when the girls went on their picnic at Hanging Rock. The mysterious disappearances could not be explained, neither by witnesses, nor by the one girl who reappeared! The story is essentially about the mystery, and how it affects those in the community and the school.
In 1987, after the author’s death, the final chapter of the novel was published as “The Secret of Hanging Rock”.
Hanging Rock is an actual geological formation in the state of Victoria.

Wednesdays July Movie Trivia of the day!  
Mark Wahlberg is Chris Cole, an enthusiastic fan of heavy metal band Steel Dragon
who has his dream come true when he replaces the band’s lead singer. What film is this?

Tuesday’s  Quizzler is….
What is the meaning of this rebus?

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQUSTRVWXYZ
 
Answer: You are out of order (the letters “U” and “R” have traded places; U R out of order).

WEDNESDAY’s Quizzler….
Detective Allison Carr pushed her way through the crowded hotel lobby and into an elevator. At the tenth floor she found a forensics crew already at work.

“What have we got here?” she asked Officer Frost.

“Victim is one Jacob Williams,” Frost said. “He and his wife and another couple are here for a week’s vacation.”

“I need names,” Carr said.

“Wife’s name is Kate. The other couple is James and Cindy Jones.”

Carr jotted the names into a small notebook. “Okay. Now, what happened?”

“The two couples were in the casino gambling. They had plans to eat at one of the city’s most exclusive restaurants. Very classy place. Anyhow, Williams left the casino first to come up here to shower, shave, and dress. The others came up later. When they were dressed and ready to go out, Williams hadn’t come out of his room yet. That’s when Mr. Jones came in here and found the body.”

“Didn’t Mrs. Williams see her husband when she came up here to dress?” Carr asked.

“Mr. Williams was a snorer. His wife couldn’t sleep in the same room with him, even at home. They had separate suites here, so she didn’t know anything was wrong until Jones told her.”

Allison Carr shook her head.

“How did Williams die?” she asked.

“He was shot with his own gun,” Frost said. “He takes it with him all the time for protection. He’s a jeweler and often carries a lot of gems when he’s working. I guess it worked against him this time.

“He was shot in the heart at close range. There was quite a bit of blood, as you’ll soon see. The medical examiner says with that kind of wound Williams may have lived for ten or fifteen seconds, but not much longer.”

Frost ushered Detective Carr into the bedroom of the late Jacob Williams’ hotel suite. Several policemen were combing the room for clues. One of them approached Carr.

“We found something interesting here. As you’ll notice, this room has a fireplace. The hotel doesn’t really expect the guests to use it, but it is a working fireplace. Someone DID use this one, though, and not too long ago. We found this in it.”

With that, the officer held out an evidence bag in which he had gathered some samples of ashes. Carr noticed the ashes had a peculiar texture: it wasn’t the type of ash left by wood or paper.

In another evidence bag were seven melted pieces of plastic and metal. Along with them was a charred piece of metal that appeared to be some sort of clip.

“Have you searched this room completely?” Carr asked.

“Yes. Here’s what we found.” Frost handed a list to the detective.

Carr read, “Five undershirts, five pair of undershorts, three pairs of brown socks, two pairs of blue socks, two blue dress shirts, three sport shirts, two pull-overs, six pair of slacks – two brown, two blue, and two black – along with a black belt, six ties – all in the current style and all different colors to match the shirts and slacks – two sport jackets – one brown and one blue – a pair of brown shoes, one pair of walking shoes, an electric razor, pre-shave and after shave, a toothbrush and toothpaste, a pair of walking shorts, pajamas, seven handkerchiefs.”

“Is that it?” she asked.

“We found the usual things on the body,” Frost said. “You know, wallet, change, keys, things like that. You ready to view the body now?”

“I think so,” Carr said as she moved toward the bed.

Jacob Williams’ body lay on the floor near the bed. A fairly large man, he was face down with his right hand outstretched and his left hand tucked under him. A large pool of blood spread out from under the body.

Williams was in his underwear and slippers. His right hand was coated with blood.

“Looks like he tried to wipe the blood off his hand before he died,” Carr said with a frown. Then she turned her attention to Williams’ bed.

Neatly laid out on it were a pair of tuxedo pants, a tuxedo jacket, and a red cumber-bun. Next to the pants was a pair of black socks. At the foot of the bed was a pair of black shoes.

“Looks like he never did get dressed for that dinner,” Carr said. “I’d like to speak to the others in the party. Where are they?”

“Next door in the wife’s suite,” Frost said.

Carr went to Mrs. Williams’ suite where three people sat; all were pale and nervous. The woman who was introduced as Mrs. Williams had obviously been crying. She wore a long yellow evening gown with shoes and purse to match. She was a short woman.

“I know what you’re going to say,” she sobbed. “You’re going to say I shot Jacob because I hated his philandering. But that’s not true. So what if he had affairs? He loved only me.”

Carr’s eyebrows went up at this remark and she turned to James Jones, a once-handsome man who was slowly showing the effects of his age. Jones was dressed in a tuxedo, white shirt, and black bow tie.

“She’s obviously upset,” Jones said of Mrs. Williams. “Jacob really was devoted to her, even if he did fool around. We were partners, you know, and he confided in me.”

“Partners?” Carr said. “Does this mean you’ll take over the entire business now?”

“Well, yes, but…,” Jones began but never finished.

“And how about you?” Carr asked Cindy Jones, a tall, graceful woman dressed in a red gown. “You’re very beautiful, if I may be so bold. Were you one of Mr. Williams’ affairs?”

“Good heavens, no!” Mrs. Jones said. “Not that he didn’t try. Oh, I’m sorry, Kate, but the truth is your husband did make several passes at me, but I never gave in, and nothing ever happened between us.”

“If I have the details straight,” Detective Carr said, “Mr. Williams left your group to go to his room to prepare for dinner while you all stayed in the casino. Were you all together?”

“No,” James Jones said. “I was playing blackjack.”

“I was at the slot machines,” Kate Williams said.

“And I was at the roulette wheel,” Cindy Jones said.

“I think one of you came to Mr. Williams’ suite earlier than you claim,” Carr said. “You argued with him, lost your temper, and shot him with his own gun. And I think I know which of you it was. As soon as I have some evidence examined, I’m sure I can prove it.”

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com: https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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